Forever Changed

My knees turned to putty as I looked at her smirking face.

“Well, well, isn’t that interesting,” Lacey’s mom said with shining eyes at the gift-wrapped-gossip bundle we had just dropped in her lap. “I’m surprised your mother has been so forgiving.”

“She was fine with it,” I lied brazenly. “She’s adult enough to know that Maddon had no control over his father’s actions,” I retorted, turning on heel.

Once we were out of sight, I made a bee-line for the exit, zigzagging and weaving through endless waves of shoppers. This wasn’t the best time to be at the mall when you wanted to get out in a hurry. By the time Maddon and I made it to Barnes and Noble, my frustration had gotten the best of me.

“Excuse me!” An unsuspecting woman bellowed after I pushed my way past without looking back. My breathing was labored from the fast pace, and at this point, I wasn’t even sure if Maddon was still with me, or what he must be thinking. I was horrified at the thought of what Lacey and her mom would do with the tasty

gossip-treat we had practically spoon-fed them. None of this would have happened if I would have kept my silent promise to my dad and walked away in the very beginning with a smile. I had risen to the bait, and now we would all pay the price.

“Man, talk about the apple not falling far from the tree,” Maddon said, snagging onto my hand to slow me down once we got outside. “It’s going to be okay,” he said, slowing me down to a stop.

“No, it won’t. Lacey’s been waiting for months for an opportunity like this! I guarantee she’s already got it plastered all over Facebook!”

“That’s insane, she was your friend.”

“Like that matters, you’ve seen what a bitch she is!” I stated, wondering if he was really that clueless on how malicious girls could be.

“With my friends it matters. We’d take a bullet for each other.”

“Not in my world,” I said, still fuming. “We wouldn’t take a slap on the wrist for each other, let alone a bullet.”

“You would,” he said quietly. “You’re different than them.”

“You think so? Did you miss the way I tore into Lacey’s mom in there? I can be a mega-bitch, too, believe me.”

“Kassandra, you’re too hard on yourself.”

“You just see me with rose-colored glasses,” I said, sick of the pretenses.

He joined me on my side of the car and rested his hand over mine. “Kassandra, we both have skeletons. Who doesn’t? So what if you weren’t perfect before? Neither was I. I let my father use me as a punching bag without ever standing up to him. I let him drink and drive, and your family paid the consequences. Do you think it’s easy to live with that?”

“That’s different. It’s harder to stand up to a parent. I knew my friends and I acted like assholes, but I still hung out with them.”

“Kass, I could have tried standing up to my father. Maybe I could have fought him off or maybe not. I just never wanted to sink to his level. I promised myself I would never turn into him. We all make our decisions. The important thing is that you’ve changed,” he said, placing his hands on my shoulders.

“Forever changed is my pact, you know, like your band name,” I whispered, resting my forehead on his chest. “I just slipped in there. I don’t want to slip again.”

“Don’t worry, babe. You got this. Besides, you’re only human. If it makes you feel any better, I wanted to break my no-violence vow in there,” he chuckled, dropping a kiss on the top of my head.

Kassandra was quiet on the drive back to my complex. I knew she was worried about Lacey’s mom running her big mouth. I wished we could spend more time together, but I knew she had plans with her family that evening.

“Are we still on for tomorrow?” I asked doubtfully, considering the next day was the day before Christmas Eve.

“I think so,” she said, still obviously worried her mom would know by then. “I’ll text you. What should I wear anyway?”

“Warm clothes. We’ll be outside all morning,” I said, parking next to her SUV.

“Where are we going again?” she pried.

“Me to know, and you to find out,” I teased, grabbing her bags from the trunk of the car and stowing them in her Explorer.

“No fun,” she pouted.

“Come on, surprises are good,” I laughed, dropping a kiss on her lips. “Text me, okay?” She nodded, though her eyes were clouded over with worry.

“Don’t worry. Maybe that hag won’t say anything. You did a pretty convincing job, making it seem like your mom already knows.”