Gus dried his hands and picked up my shoe before dropping the towel into a laundry basket at the edge of the room. He slowly walked toward me, holding my pump and smiling. When he was standing a half a foot away, he reached out and put a weathered hand under my chin and tipped my face up so he could look me in the eye as he said, “Child, that’s where you’re sorely mistaken. It was never yours to lose.”
My eyes widened as I listened to him speak.
“But—” I protested.
“No buts about it, Sweetness,” he said, shaking his head as he handed me my shoe. “You have to make a choice about what you truly value. I don’t envy you, and I have no idea what choice I’d make if I were in your shoes, but what I do know is that this choice will shape your life for years to come, so you’d better spend some time really thinking about what it is that you want.”
He let go of my chin and I dropped my head as I cradled my shoe and thought about what he’d said.
“Gus, what if I make the wrong decision?” I whispered without looking up.
“Sweetness, that’s the risk in any decision we make,” he said as he grabbed a rag from the shelf behind me and began wiping down the training tables. “There’s no right choice. Every decision has consequences and outcomes both intended and unintended. The question is which ones can you see yourself living with and which ones are absolutely unbearable?”
“I don’t want to let my family down,” I said as the tears welled up. “I want to do what’s right, and I want to make sure everyone is happy, but…”
“Child, you can’t make other people happy,” he said as he sprayed something on the cloth and began to wipe the stainless-steel legs of one of the tables. “It’s not your job to make others happy. You need to make yourself happy and let the others take care of themselves, but you also have a duty to fulfill.”
“But I want to do what’s right and make myself happy, too!” I cried as a few tears ran down my cheeks. “I want to try and rise in the ranks of sports managers and get a job as a general manager one day. I don’t see how I can do that if I’m getting married and having children.”
“Yep, that’s a tough order,” he nodded as he stooped down and rubbed a spot at the base of the table. “I don’t envy you, Sweetness. It’s not easy being a woman in this game. Not at all.”
“But why doesn’t my mother understand that?” I asked as I swiped away the tears with one hand. “She’s running the Bears, for God’s sake, but she can’t afford her daughter the opportunity to build a career? I don’t get it!”
“I have no idea what your mother’s thinking,” he said standing up and putting his hands on his hips. He looked like a small, brown superhero in a yellow polo shirt and black track pants, and I chuckled a little at the sight. He smiled and said, “I do know that your grandfather was mighty tough on her, though. Have you asked why she’s forcing this decision right now?”
“I tried, but she wouldn’t explain herself,” I grumbled. “She just kept saying something about family loyalty and that I needed to do my part.”
“I can’t help you with that,” he shrugged before dropping his hands to his sides. “And I can’t tell you which choice is the right one. I can only tell you that, given the choices you have, you’re not going to get everything you want, and that’s a shame.”
“But what if I want it all, Gus?” I asked.
“Then you’re going to have to draw up one hell of a playbook for that, Sweetness!” he laughed as he tossed the rag back up on the shelf and said, “What have you been doing? You look pretty fancy, but you smell like a cheap dive bar!”
“How do you know these things?” I laughed loudly as leaned down and slipped my pump on my foot before pulling the other one toward me with my big toe.
“Child, I’ve been around young men — and old ones, too — for most of my adult life,” he said dryly. “And I know more than I ever wanted to know.”
“I was over at Black Jack blowing off steam after my meeting with my mother,” I admitted as I stood up. I still felt a little wobbly on my feet, but better than I had coming into the training room. “I met someone of interest, too.”
“Oh, who’s that?”
“Dax Connor,” I said and watched Gus’ eyebrows raise so high on his forehead they looked like they were ready to take off in flight.
“Oooh, you’d better watch yourself with that one,” he said shaking his head and tsking as he moved back toward his office. “I’ve heard he’s wild and dangerous, and that he doesn’t play by the rules.”
“So what if he is? And what if he doesn’t?” I said.
“Sometimes wil
d and dangerous is exciting and sometimes it is just what it says it is,” he said as I followed him to the office and watched as he gathered his paperwork and shut down his computer. “You’d be wise to know which type of wild and dangerous you’re dealing with before you join the rodeo.”
“He seems nice enough,” I said a little too defensively.
“Mmm hmm,” Gus nodded without saying anything more. I bristled because I knew he was holding back what he was really thinking, but I quickly decided that I didn’t want to know.
Gus offered me a ride home, and when I told him I’d call a cab, he simply smiled and kissed the top of my head before saying, “Pride goeth before a fall, Sweetness. Remember that.”
“I will,” I said as I hugged him tightly and then sauntered back down the hallway to catch my ride.