“Nope, going to hang out here with the cool people.”
“Oh, but don’t you have anyone?”
Erik looked up toward the ceiling like he was thinking really hard about it. I couldn’t help but notice that he had shaved. He looked younger without the scruff from his beard on his face. He looked more like a movie star than a tech businessman. I could imagine him in a tuxedo walking down a red carpet, probably holding onto a sexy model at his side.
“Nope, I’m going to chill here. It’s fine, I’m excited to have some peace, and Kaitlin promised me I’d get to swim as much as I wanted.”
He tried to put on a happy face, but underneath it, I saw so much pain. How could he have no one to spend the holiday with? I couldn’t imagine a life like that at all. Even when my parents had forced me into treatment, I always knew that they would be there for me. Sure, they might be really angry with me, but they would always love me.
“Your mom has passed away, but what about the rest of your family? Your father, maybe?”
“I’m staying here. That’s the end of it, okay, Cassidy?” he said firmly.
“It’s just that normally only the new people stay. All the programming will be the groups that you’ve already done, and we only do half of those. You’re going to get really bored.”
Erik looked extremely annoyed at me for continuing with the topic, but I couldn’t let him sit at Paradise Peak for the whole holiday if there was anywhere else that he could go. Even though I had signed up to work, it was starting to look like even I wasn’t going to be needed. If there were really only six patients, there would be no need for a technician to work with the nurses; they would likely just have two nurses on staff.
“I’m staying. Tell who you need to tell and let’s drop it.”
“What about your business partner? What was his name again?”
“Spencer, and no. I’m not going to intrude on him. I’m fine, Cassidy. I really am. I’ve got a couple of new books to read, I’m going to work out and swim, it’s goin
g to be like a little vacation for me. I’m perfectly fine. Now if you don’t drop it, I’m going to start crying like Brianna did,” he said with a half of a grin.
“I can tell Mr. March that you’re a maybe, that way if you make some plans, it won’t matter to the scheduling.”
Erik looked at me with a stern look, stood up, and walked directly to his new room, with a door. He didn’t say another word to me all morning long. He wasn’t the type of guy who liked a good argument, I could tell that right away. I imagined at his business, people didn’t question him much when he made decisions and probably just followed all the orders he gave.
Leaving for the holiday wasn’t just about seeing family, though. A couple of days outside of the walls of the treatment center gave patients the ability to test drive their new coping skills. When there weren’t holidays scheduled, patients could still get a leave to go home with their family for a night or a weekend. It really was the perfect opportunity for patients to see what was working for them and what they still struggled with.
“Aren’t you on a roll today?” Kaitlin laughed as both Erik and Brianna seemed to be ignoring me. “What happened to the girl everyone loved?”
“I have no idea. I just asked Erik if there was anyone who he could spend the holiday with. I can’t fathom that he doesn’t have at least one person in his life that he would want to see in Christmas.”
“Cassidy, not everyone has loving families. You know this, I know you do.”
“It’s just weird.”
“You know what’s weird?” she asked as she leaned in. “It’s weird how your eyes light up when you’re talking to him.”
“What? No they don’t,” I protested.
“Um, I watched you talking to him. You definitely light up.”
“No, I don’t!”
“I just call it like I see it,” she said smugly as she leaned back in her chair.
“I don’t even know what you’re talking about. Maybe I shouldn’t go dancing with you tonight. You’re just going to say I’m in love with every guy I have a conversation with.”
“You’re in love with Erik?” Kaitlin teased.
“Yeah, that’s exactly it, I’m in love with Erik,” I said sarcastically.
The look on Kaitlin’s face told me he was behind me long before I turned around and actually saw him. My heart sank at the idea that he had just heard what I had said. No, I didn’t love him. Obviously, I didn’t love the guy – I hardly knew him. But the pure fact that the words had left my mouth and he had heard them…it was mortifying.
“I love you, too,” he said and winked at me. “Kaitlin, can I get some towels?” he asked as he turned his attention to her.