. I heard Red curse furiously as I let him go, and he got to his feet, flushing with embarrassment. I glanced at him to make sure his pride wasn’t too bruised, and he gave me a tentative smile that was tinged with admiration.
“How the fuck did you manage that?” he demanded.
“First of all, I took advantage of the fact that you obviously underestimated me,” I said. “Second of all, I took advantage of your weaknesses.”
“I don’t have any weaknesses,” Red said immediately.
I laughed. “Oh, that’s right. Is that why you won the fight? Oh, wait…”
The men laughed, and Red cursed again. “Well, I’ll say one thing for Zack… he trained you well.”
“Please! You should see her with Zack’s blade,” Lonny said. “She’s deadly with that thing.”
I followed Red out of the ring as the men looked at me with new respect. I had to admit, it was a heady feeling, and it made me feel like if Walter walked into the training ring right now, I would be able to take him out easily. I knew that was simply my ego talking, but it was nice to imagine all the same.
“I thought that blade looked familiar,” I heard Red say. “Didn’t John used to use it?”
That caught my attention, and I listened more carefully as the men spoke.
“Yeah, it was John’s… it’s like a family heirloom or whatever.”
“Fuck, that can’t be true.”
“Nah… but it has been passed down from father to son at least two generations back,” Bones clarified. “It’s small, so he figured it would be easy for Mila to use.”
“Yeah, that and he wants to get in her pants,” Red sniggered.
I came a little closer, and Red caught sight of me. “Oh… didn’t see you, Mila.”
“Where did you think I went, Red?” I smirked at him.
“Dipshit,” Lonny said, smacking him in the back of the head. “Don’t pay attention to him, Mila.”
“Oh, don’t worry, I never pay attention to Red.”
The men laughed, and I took a sip of water, but my mind was elsewhere. Was it true that Zack had given me his father’s blade? That was a pretty significant gesture… right? But he did have a complicated relationship with his father, so maybe it wasn’t as sentimental a gesture as I was interpreting it to be.
“Are you staying the night today?” Red asked, looking over at the other boys.
“We’re going riding tonight,” Lonny told him.
“Hey, nobody told me,” Red complained.
“Yeah… and most people take that as a hint.”
“Fuck you!” Red said.
I laughed and left the boys to their antics. I went upstairs and had a quick shower in my tiny little bathroom. I put on sweats and collapsed onto my bed. My body was tired, but my mind was wired from the workout. I was supposed to have training with Zack this morning, but when I had walked into the training arena, he was nowhere to be found. Apparently, he had sent word that he had errands to run and he had told some of the other guys to train with me. I had to admit; I had been a little disappointed. I didn’t mind training with the other guys, but it wasn’t the same as it was with Zack. And lately, the two of us had been getting along a lot better.
Apparently, when Zack let his guard down long enough to speak to me like a human being and not just a piece of meat, we actually managed to find some common ground. We actually managed to hold conversations that stuck with me days after. I hadn’t seen him the whole day, and I kind of missed him. For a second, I wondered if he was off with some random woman, and my stomach turned at the thought.
“Dear God,” I whispered to myself. “I hope that’s not true.”
I knew I had no right to hope such a thing. Zack had every right to see other women. He had every right to fuck other women. Especially since I’d made it very clear to him that I wasn’t about to sleep with him. But still, jealousy burned inside me. Even if he weren’t with anybody right now, he would be one day. Maybe leaving was the best option for me no matter how this thing turned out with Walter.
This experience, living with the crew had changed me. It wasn’t immediately evident, but I knew that the moment I tried to go back to my old life, I would feel its effects. The only thing I really missed was my freedom. Sometimes being in the clubhouse felt like an open cage.
I was just thinking about Zack and where he might be when I heard a knock on my door. “Who is it?” I asked.