Biker's Virgin

“Let’s be quiet, in case Dad’s asleep,” I whispered when we got back to Cole’s. It felt, in a way, like I was coming home, even though I wasn’t walking into my own house.

“Dad’s not on the couch,” Declan said. “Where is he?”

“He might be in his room.”

I peeked my head into the bedroom. Cole was lying in bed, fast asleep. His cheeks were flushed, and with his face completely relaxed like that, he looked young, almost like a boy again.

“Let’s just let him sleep,” I said as I pulled the door shut gently. “Do you want to come over to my house and we can work in the garden some more?”

“Yeah, I want to look for some more worms!”

“I bet you’ll be able to find some. We might even be able to put some of the seeds in the ground.”

Declan and I worked out in the garden for a long time, until I realized that the sun had sunk below the tops of the trees in the side yard.

“You getting hungry?” I asked Declan. “We’ve been working pretty hard out here.”

And we had made good progress. Some kids might’ve gotten bored after a while, but Declan was more than happy to help, and I could tell that he liked getting to see how the garden was changing.

The sun was starting to set as we walked back next door. I made Declan a grilled cheese for dinner, and then we watched a show together. Afterward, I could tell he was sleepy, so I told him it was time to start getting ready for bed.

“Can you read me some stories?” he asked, stifling a yawn.

“Sure I can,” I said. “But why don’t you go get into PJs and brush your teeth,” I said. I went upstairs with him, and he changed into pajamas and brushed his teeth.

“You can go in and whisper goodnight to Dad,” I said.

Declan tiptoed in and as he did so, Cole shifted, murmuring something. Declan came back out a few seconds later.

“Dad says he’s feeling a little better,” he said as I followed him down the hall to his bedroom.

He picked out three stories for me to read to him, and as I was almost done with the second one, Cole came in. He sat down in the glider chair that was next to the bed and listened to the rest of the stories.

“Did you guys have a good time today?” he asked.

Declan smiled sleepily and started to tell him about the ice cream with the gummy bears. “The gummy bears got really hard,” he said. “They weren’t chewy at all.”

His eyelids started to flutter, so I gave him a kiss goodnight, and then Cole and I went downstairs.

“Hey, thanks for taking him like that today,” Cole said. “I feel much better now, and I think it’s because I was able to just come home this afternoon and sleep.”

“We had a great day,” I said. “We got you some soup; I don’t know if you feel like having it now, but it’s in the fridge. I can heat it up for you, if you want.”

“That might be good, actually,” he said. “I didn’t really eat much this morning.”

I went into the kitchen and retrieved the soup out of the refrigerator. Instead of putting it in the microwave, I rummaged through the cupboards and found a small copper pot. I turned the gas burner on and poured the container of soup into the pot. I liked being able to do this; there was a warm happiness in me as I found a bowl and a spoon, and tested the soup to see if it was warm.

He looked like he was feeling much better, I thought as he ate the soup. When he was finished, we went into the living room to see if there was anything good to watch on TV.

We were sitting close to each other on the couch. At first, just our legs were touching, but we both must’ve shifted toward each other, a little bit at a time, because soon our sides were touching, too. It was as though I was being drawn in as if by a magnet. His eyes were half-closed, and he had a smile on his face.

“I want to do this more than anything,” he said. “But I don’t want to get you sick. I do feel about a thousand times better than I did this afternoon, though.”

“I’m not afraid of getting sick,” I said. “I hardly ever get sick anyway.”

That was true, but even if it wasn’t, I probably would have kissed him anyway. It just seemed like that’s exactly what I was supposed to do right then; in fact, it was the only thing I wanted to do, so I leaned a little closer and, for the third time, felt his lips against mine. This time, though, I wasn’t going to bite him, at least not like I had done before. I felt his hand come up, his fingers pressing the side of my neck as he moved his mouth against mine.

I’d always thought I’d be a little afraid the first time I had sex, especially since I had gotten older, but I didn’t feel an ounce of fear or nervousness, which only made me think that I was doing the right thing. Of course I’d gotten myself off before, but I had never felt like this. My whole body seemed like it was buzzing, so hyperaware of his every move, his every touch. I let my legs fall apart when I felt his hand against me, and he was gentle, moving his fingers through my pubic hair, slowly moving down to my clit, then further, sliding a finger inside of me. Technically, he’d already had a finger inside of me, though that time, there had been a speculum and latex gloves; now there was no cold metal, only his warm hands and the slick wetness between my legs. I pushed my pelvis against him, grinding, trying to get his finger in further because it felt as though there was a certain place he needed to reach, way inside of me.