It was all true, as much as I hated saying it. I spared a moment to think about what it would be like if the baby was mine and she had come to me consulting about prenatal care. If her night with Buck had never happened.
I remembered how happy I'd been when Emily had told me that she was pregnant with Emma. I'd done everything that I could to be there for her during the pregnancy. I had taken care of her, massaged her feet and ankles when they'd gotten swollen and sore. I’d also gone to whatever lengths were necessary to satisfy her food cravings, even though a lot of times, by the time I got home with whatever it was that she had been craving, she had moved on to another bizarre craving.
But I had to stop thinking about that. This situation was totally different. For starters, it wasn't my baby.
Olivia's face fell. “Eric, I know that we never talked about what happened at the hospital, but I thought—”
I interrupted her with a bitter laugh. “It's not the hospital that I'm upset about; you know that.” I didn't know how she could continue to be so dense. She apparently really didn't realize that I knew about her and Buck.
Olivia paused. “I don't know what you're talking about, but I don't know why you would refuse to treat me,” she said, sounding pained. “I'll pay for my appointments; I'm not asking you to treat me as a friend. But don't you want to make sure that your baby has the best prenatal care possible?”
“My baby?” I asked incredulously. “Nice try!” I narrowed my eyes at her. “I know the baby isn't mine, and I can't believe that you would try to pass it off as mine. But then again, we all know you're a liar.”
“What are you talking about?” Olivia asked, and I almost believed that she was truly confused.
“We were careful,” I snapped. “I used a condom every time, and I know you're on birth control; I wrote your prescription for it last month, or do you not remember that?”
“But accidents happen, don't they?” Olivia asked desperately. “You're a doctor; you know birth control isn't 100% effective. Maybe there was a leak, or something else happened. I haven't slept with anyone else. Unless you're accusing me of being the next Mary, it has to be yours.”
“Oh, come off it,” I snarled. “I know that you slept with Buck the night you went to that wedding. I don't know why you feel the need to lie about it, but I know it's true. Now, I recommend that you talk to Dr. Lazaro about prenatal care, and please don't try to involve me in your personal life again.”
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Olivia
I felt like I might burst into tears at any second. I had finally gotten up the guts to tell Eric about the pregnancy, and now, I was regretting having done so. From the sound of things, he wanted no part in this baby's life.
It was enough to have me considering giving the baby up for adoption. I wasn't sure that I could be the mother that I needed to be, knowing that the baby had been born out of such an unhappy relationship. But I knew I couldn't do that. Things were so uncertain with Mom at the moment, and the only bright spot that I had at the moment was the knowledge that I was finally going to be giving her a grandchild. She had already gone shopping for some itsy bitsy shoes for the baby, as well as a couple of stuffed animals and other clothing items.
I didn't know what I'd expected, coming into Eric's office, but it definitely hadn't been this.
“Eric, I never slept with Buck,” I insisted. “I'm telling you, you're the only man that I slept with.”
“Take your lies somewhere else,” Eric said angrily. “I've had about enough of them! I heard Buck at the gas station. He was talking to Gary, the cashier, telling him all about how he fucked you. I think the details were that first you rode him, and then he pounded into you from behind? Does that sound accurate?”
I felt faint. I couldn't believe that Buck had said something like that. From what I knew of the man, even if we had slept together, he wasn't the type to go blabbing the details all over town. But the truth was, we hadn't slept together, so that made it even more puzzling. I didn't know what he was trying to gain by lying about it.
I swallowed hard. “Eric,” I pleaded, taking a step closer, reaching out toward him.
But Eric stepped back, his eyes hard and his arms folded across his chest. “Don't,” he said warningly. “I don't know what you think you're gaining by lying to me, but I'm not falling for it. He had all the details, Olivia, right down to that butterfly tattoo on your lower back. How else would he have known about that, if he didn't see you naked?”
“People see my tattoo all the time when my shirt rides up,” I said, shaking my head. “Eric, I swear to you, I didn't sleep with him. Please.”
“Get out of my office,” Eric said coldly.
“You're not going to tell anyone about the baby, are you?” I asked desperately. I didn't want to keep it a secret from the whole town, but I also didn't need Eric telling everyone that I was pregnant with Buck's kid. I could only imagine how confusing things would be if that were to happen.
Eric's face twisted into a nasty expression, but then he nodded curtly at me. “Just like any other patient, what we've discussed is confidential,” he said, emphasizing the fact that I was 'just like any other patient.' The words were like a stab to the heart, but at least I didn't have to worry about him telling anyone.
I stumbled out of his office, wishing that there was something that I could do to fix this. But I didn't even have anyone I could talk to about this. Telling Mom was certainly out of the question, and Eric was the only person that I had become friends with there in Tamlin. There were my friends back in Chicago, too, but I hadn't talked to any of them since I had moved away. We were all at such different places in our lives that it was difficult finding any common ground.
What I wanted was to confront Buck and ask why he'd been lying about me, but I couldn't do that. For all I knew, he hadn't actually lied about me at all. It was just something that Eric had made up. That seemed plausible.
Maybe Eric just really didn't want to be a father again.
The thought was sobering. He had told me right at the start that I was the first person that he had slept with since his wife. His signals toward me had been so hot and cold: he'd been so interested, and then we'd slept together, and he'd avoided me. Repeat.
I had to realize that sleeping with me must raise complicated feelings in him. And knowing that I was pregnant must make everything even more complicated. Maybe he felt like being happy to find out that I was pregnant meant that he was dishonoring his former wife. Or maybe he was concerned about how it would affect Emma.