“A half-sister,” Kristen nodded. She seemed somehow different. As though her body had tensed suddenly.
“Is she older?” I asked.
“By a few years,” she replied without any emotion.
“I didn’t know that.”
Kristen looked down, and I could see the emotion build up inside her. “We don’t have contact,” she said flatly, as though she would have rather spoken about anything else in the world. There was something in her eyes that told me that she cared about this half-sister, though.
“I’m sorry, Kristen,” I said, reaching out and taking her hand. “I didn’t mean to upset you.”
“You didn’t upset me,” she said quickly. “It’s just that talkin
g about my family has always been a little difficult for me. It’s embarrassing.”
“Why should it be?” I asked. “Their decisions have nothing to do with you.”
“It’s reflective of where I came from,” she tried to explain. “They are a part of me, no matter how fast I try to run from that. My mother…she’s the last person in the world I want to be like, and yet, my greatest fear is that I’m exactly like her.”
“Is that the source of your strained relationship with her?”
“Strained,” Kristen repeated, as though she were amused with the word. “That’s putting it lightly. It’s only a small part of the source. The more relevant part has to do with the fact that I outed her years ago.”
I frowned. “What do you mean?”
“I had known about my father’s other family for a while,” Kristen explained. “I was a teenager, and I was angry and confused and just…disappointed in everything and everyone. Finally, I came to the conclusion that my father’s wife should be made aware of the situation.”
“Wait,” I said, raising my eyebrows. “You exposed your parents’ affair.”
“Pretty much,” she sighed. “I tracked down my father’s wife, which was surprisingly easy to do, then I drove two hours to the address I’d found, and… I told her.”
I raised my eyebrows. “What did she say?”
“I didn’t wait for her to say anything,” I said. “I told her what I needed to tell her, and then I got back into my car and drove back home. The truth was, I couldn’t even meet her eye. My mother was the home wrecker—and I was the embodiment of her character.”
“Kristen,” I said gently. “That’s harsh—you are not the embodiment of anything but your own actions and choices. You can’t be held accountable for what your parents did. If that were the case, we’d all be paying for the sins of those who came before us.”
Kristen closed her eyes for a moment. “Her whole life was a lie,” she said. “It just felt like my life was a lie, as well.”
“Your life is your own,” I assured her. “It’s yours to shape; if you don’t want to be like your mother, then don’t be like her. It’s as simple as that.”
Kristen smiled sadly for a moment. “That’s easier said than done.”
“Give yourself more credit,” I said, kissing her hand gently. “You’re stronger than you realize.”
“And, you know that for a fact do you?” she asked challengingly.
“Actually, I do,” I smiled confidently.
That got a small laugh out of her, and I felt her relax. “See?” I said. “Sharing can be cathartic…”
“I don’t know about it being cathartic,” she said. “But I did like talking to you about all that. I feel closer to you.”
“Which is exactly my point,” I nodded. “Which is why I want you to meet my aunt soon.”
“Your aunt?” Kristen asked.
“She’s the closest thing to family I have left,” I said. “And, she’s always been a mother to me. I’d like you to meet her.”