He sat on the other side of the hot tub from me, and I appreciated him giving me the space. When I invited him to come home with me for Christmas, it was out
of pity. He had a sad look on his face when I told him about my family, and I had always been a sucker for puppy dog eyes.
My family enjoyed Christmas, and I was happy to bring anyone home with me if they could have an enjoyable day with us. Over the years, I had brought home some shady characters; my family really was used to dealing with my invites and the randomness of who would walk through the doors.
But I still wasn’t planning on letting my family find out that Erik was really a patient at the Paradise Peak. It was wrong, and I knew it. Well, to be exact, I hadn’t specifically heard that we weren’t allowed to bring patients home for Christmas. So, technically, I could claim ignorance if it was ever brought up at work.
“It’s quiet around here, though, I like it,” Erik said as he closed his eyes and looked up at the stars.
“I know. It’s weird how peaceful it seems here, yet just over that hill there are thousands of people squeezing in a family skiing vacation with their holiday.”
“You and your family have lived here your whole life?”
“Well, my family has. I tried living other places while I was drinking. I always ended up back at home when some random alcoholic boyfriend would leave me stranded someplace.”
“I know you are being honest with your past and drinking, but I have to say, I just don’t see you as a drunk. Every time I look at you, I see you as working as a daycare worker or something else sweet like that.”
I burst into laughter at the idea I could ever work with children. Erik obviously didn’t know me all that well. I didn’t have patience for children; there was no way I could ever work with them. And, I certainly didn’t plan on having any of my own anytime soon. I had a hard enough time taking care of myself.
“It’s the tongue piercing, isn’t it? All those daycare workers have tongue piercings,” I joked.
“That piercing is really hot,” he said as he lifted his head and looked over at me.
I had just narrowly escaped his grip while we were in the pool, and I suspected I was going to have to fend him off again really soon. My defenses were weakening, though. His touch felt good. His skin against mine felt almost like we were meant for each other.
When he grabbed my ass, I didn’t pull away right away because it honestly didn’t bother me. Which was weird. Throughout my history as a dating woman, I never remembered feeling all that comfortable with men.
Sure, I enjoyed a good roll in the hay like anyone else. But I always felt like my body wasn’t good enough. I had an underlying narrative that told me they weren’t interested in me and didn’t like my body. Men never specifically said those things to me, yet I said them and felt them when I was with a guy.
Things were different with Erik. I felt different. When his hands had been on me, I didn’t think about myself consciousness at all. I only thought about how much I wanted to kiss him.
Kissing Erik was quickly occupying my thoughts, and before I realized what was going on, he had slid across the hot tub and landed himself right next to me. My heart quickened with anticipation as I tried to contain my excitement. I wanted to feel his hand touch my leg. I practically willed it to happen as I looked over at him and then quickly away.
Erik Levy was damn hot.
I couldn’t help but adore his new, clean-shaven look. As I looked over again toward him, I saw that he was admiring me, as well. Although he kept a reasonable distance away from me, I felt the sexual power between us.
The grinding electricity of our two bodies in the warm chlorinated water filled the space between us. We wanted to touch. Both of us stopped the urge and controlled our own desires, but we wanted to touch each other.
I wanted to let my hand slide down into the water and feel the soft skin of his hard body. My imagination had my hand sliding into his swim shorts and pulling him out so I could play with him a little. Oh, how he would be so shocked if I just slid under the water and took his hardness in my mouth. Would he be able to keep from moaning out with pleasure? I didn’t think so.
Erik had been at the treatment facility for almost a month. Surely, his body was near explosion simply from the desire that had built up for the days he was celibate. I could be the first woman he was with as a sober man. He’d remember me always. Having sober sex after struggling with addiction was an erotic experience, and I wanted to be the one to share it with Erik.
There had been one man, right after my treatment, but he wasn’t a good lover at all. When my friends told me about their first sober sex experiences, I was greatly disappointed that mine had not been as fulfilling. I even broke up with the guy over it. Although, technically, I shouldn’t have been dating so close to getting out of treatment.
“Let me see your tongue piercing,” Erik said as he turned toward me.
Dutifully, I opened my mouth and stuck my tongue out at him. He examined it from where he was and then let his fingers gently touch the metal ball that I had attached to a rod going through the middle of my tongue.
“Yes, it hurt when I got it.” I laughed as I tried to talk with my tongue out.
“That’s not what I was thinking about.”
“What then?”
“Did you get it because some guy wanted you to have it while you gave him head?”
It was the first time anyone had asked me that specific question. Typically, people avoided the sexual reference to the tongue piercing and just concentrated on the pain it must have caused me. But Erik wasn’t just asking if I could give good head with the piercing – he asked if a man had made me do it.