The pain thickened my voice. "But you went to him instead."
Her soft hands swept over my cheeks. "He's always been my best counterbalance."
I squeezed her hands in mine and then dropped them. It was impossible, but I felt exactly like I had all those years ago, torn between two people and caught in a struggle I did not understand.
"Oh, my sweet boy. You need to talk to your father. And you need to get rid of that girl. I sense lies," Alice said. She blinked and looked deep into my eyes. "You're lying. She doesn't know who you are."
"I'm not a Templeton."
"Are you a Brightwater?" my mother asked. She smiled and shook her head. "I see it, what you think of me. But who is really the reckless and unattached one?"
"God, I'm glad I brought a human shield."
My mother's cherry-red lips curled in a smile. "Yes, me too. I can't wait to see how she holds up."
I caught her sleeves. "Please play nice."
"I could say the same to you. Why won't you at least listen to your father?"
My chest burned with frustration. "I don't want to hear a single thing that comes out of his mouth."
Alice's eyes pleaded with me. "Alcoholism is a disease, Penn. Your father never meant to hurt us."
"How can you say that? Here you are, the epitome of an independent woman. You teach people to trust themselves and to not let others hold them down."
"And I never would have found my truth if it wasn't for your father's mistakes."
I shook my head, feeling sick. "Those weren't mistakes. He was blind drunk, but he still managed to hit you. How can you just forget that?"
My mother gripped my arms. "I didn't forget, Penn. I forgave. I forgave your father, and it's time you do the same."
I reeled back from her. "This is insane. Next, you're going to tell me you love him."
"I do. I always did, and I always will."
"I'm going to be sick," I said.
"Grow up, Penn." My mother's strong voice stopped me. "Don't you know by now that people lose control? People make mistakes, and they hurt the people they love."
"Then it wasn't really love," I fought back.
Alice laughed, free and open. "You wouldn't know love if it bit you in the ass. I mean, have you honestly asked yourself why you dragged that stuffy, little blonde along? People do strange things when they are in love."
My mother was impossible to fight with. She flowed from intensity to humor and from obtuse claims to sharp observations at a dizzying pace. It was too much.
I held up both hands in defeat. "We're just here to have dinner and see how you are."
"Nonsense. You're just here to badger me about my treatments." Alice wrapped her arms around me and walked me back to the front of her yurt. "And I love you for it."
"So you'll forgive me for interfering?"
Alice watched my father and Corsica pick their way through the grass back to us. "Only if you listen to your father. He's trying to make amends."
"Without his checkbook?" I snorted.
Her bare foot crushed the arch of mine. "Stop being so stubborn. You're just like him. I can't believe he hasn't told you that he's in A.A."
"What?"