“I’m awake,” I said, shrugging. “Sorry. I was up all night.”
He nodded. “I understand your concern for your daughter, but the best thing you can do is make sure you take care of yourself as well.”
He glanced at Juniper and then back to me. It was obvious from the look on his face that he had bad news he was trying to figure out how to deliver.
My stomach knotted, and I swallowed. All night long, Juniper had woken up, coughing and wheezing. They’d given her more antibiotics and other medicines, and when I asked them what they were doing, they told me not to worry and that everything would be fine.
I didn’t need to be a doctor to see that my daughter seemed to be getting worse, not better.
“Just spit it out,” I said. Looking down, I sighed. “I’m sorry. I don’t mean to be rude. I know something’s wrong. Please just tell me what it is.”
“Her blood work has worsened,” the doctor said. “Along with some other things. I’ll be honest. She had a really bad night.”
“I know. I saw it.” I sighed and rubbed my temples, doing my best to put on a brave face. When Juniper woke up, I couldn’t let her see fear on my face. “So where do we go from here? She’s got pneumonia from strep. You can handle this, right?”
The doctor held up his hand. “Don’t worry. We have the situation under control.” He lowered his hand. “We’re changing medications. These are third-line antibiotics that should help handle the underlying infection. We’re confident this will improve things, but Juniper will need to stay in the hospital for at least two more days. We’ll know by tomorrow if the new medications are working. If everything goes well, we might be able to discharge her by tomorrow night.”
I nodded slowly and didn’t say anything. The doctor continued to explain about Juniper’s condition, but I could barely hear him over the thumping of my heart.
Even though he said she might get better just as quickly, it was hard to believe him. I thought when we’d entered the hospital that she’d maybe spend a night there, and now she was getting worse. The chance that we’d be having an even scarier conversation the next day was way too high for me to be comfortable.
The strep hadn’t seemed like that big of a deal on Monday, just something that basic antibiotics could handle. Her admission to the hospital had scared me, and now I was downright terrified. No mother wanted to hear that her daughter’s condition worsened while she was sitting in a hospital surrounded by nurses and doctors.
If they couldn’t help her, then who could? This was the best children’s hospital in Nashville.
“Do you understand what I’m saying?” the doctor said, cutting through my thoughts. He frowned slightly as if he knew I hadn’t been paying close attention to him.
Unfortunately for him, I was too worried to care about if I was being rude.
I offered him a nod. Even if I hadn’t been paying attention, I understood enough. Either the new treatment would work, or my daughter would get even sicker. My stomach churned at the thought. I wouldn’t even let myself think about the worst-case scenario.
“Thank you for everything,” I said. “I really appreciate what you’re doing for my daughter.”
“We’ll make sure she gets better soon, Emily.” With a final nod, he headed off.
* * *
For a place where people needed to be awake, the coffee in the cafeteria was terrible. It was like someone was trying to make sure the employees didn’t drink it.
Sadly, after a mostly sleepless night,
I needed something to keep me up, so I kept sipping at the awful swill. Mama was up in the room spending some time with Juniper while I had a little breakfast. At least the sausage and fruit were better than the coffee.
As I sat there drinking coffee and eating melon and sausages, I wondered how Juniper had even ended up in the hospital. Strep wasn’t something that lingered for a long time before symptoms showed. That suggested she’d been infected when she was staying with Lionel.
I knew it was pointless to ask him about it again, but the thought burned me. It probably had something to do with his new girlfriend, and as bad it was, I hoped he ended up sick too, so he could at least have to deal with some of the same pain.
I considered that might be unfair. She could have picked it up from a kid at school. There was a kid at her old daycare who was a strep carrier. The kid never got sick, but he also kept infecting other kids. Fortunately, Juniper never got sick. Until now.
Maybe it was a kid from her school. Maybe it was someone else. That didn’t change my feelings about Lionel.
I couldn’t believe the way he’d acted when I called to tell him. He acted like I was inconveniencing him. It wasn’t exactly hard to plan a trip to Mexico, and the fact he didn’t even seem to care that his daughter was in the hospital confused and angered me.
I munched on a sausage link. I was so sick of Lionel. When we’d divorced, I agreed to joint custody only because I thought it’d be good for Juniper. She needed to understand that we’d gotten divorced because of adult problems that had nothing to do with her, but now I felt like Lionel cared more about annoying me than about his daughter.
If that was what things had been turned into, things needed to change. Juniper still only understood love, and I wouldn’t let her be poisoned by hatred, either my own or his.
Maybe we would need to reconsider the custody situation. I didn’t mind him having girlfriends, but I did mind him exposing my daughter to him constantly switching women. She needed a stable environment for both parents, and Lionel’s jailbait of the month habit wasn’t providing that.