“Dude, you had a C-section with the twins. Your scar is barely visible, and your vagina is still intact. They should be going down on you.”
“Should and do are totally different things. The men who take me to bed have no interest but to get off. Hence, the thirty seconds, and that’s me being kind. Remember the guy who had a foot fetish and tried to jack off with my feet?”
“Oh yeah.” She nodded. “Foot Fetish Fred. But that’s exactly my point! You can actually ask them questions, and pick the right one to suck on your cl—”
“Sage…”
“I already bought the tickets. Plus, it’s for a good cause. It’s a charity for kids with cancer. I spent three hundred dollars on our tickets, so we’re going. Even if I have to drag you there kicking and screaming.”
Aspyn was a lifestyle blogger. She had over a million followers on her blog page alone, not to mention all the other social media she had. The girl liked to shop and had great taste. She made a killing on affiliate codes and brands reaching out to her for sponsored content.
I laughed. “What am I supposed to ask them? Do you know how to find my g-spot?”
“I mean, in this day and age, I feel like that’s a fair question.”
I rolled my eyes at her.
“Don’t give me that look. You’re almost twenty-four years old, and you have a smoking hot body. Have you looked at yourself in the mirror lately? I don’t even know where your kids came from. If I hadn’t seen you pregnant myself, I’d tell you you’re full of shit and they did not come out of you.”
“Sage, I was sixteen when I had them. My body bounced back like it was nothing. Haven’t you seen Sixteen and Pregnant? All those moms look amazing too.”
“I don’t know about those moms. I know about you, and I know how your twins always come first. For one night, can you just put your vagina first and act your age?”
“The last time I acted my age, I wound up, up the stick.”
“And look how well that turned out? Your twins are the most beautiful little humans I’ve ever met.”
“Yeah.” I nodded, smiling. “They are pretty awesome.”
“Thank God they took after you and not their piece of shit father.”
“I don’t want to talk about him.”
“Good. Neither do I. So it’s settled. I’ll be back around seven to get you dressed.”
I glanced down at my clothes. “What’s wrong with the way I dress?”
“You dress like you’re a Kindergarten teacher.”
“I am a Kindergarten teacher.”
She pointed at me. “Exactly.”
There was no reason in arguing with her; I’d end up losing. Aspyn always got her way. There was just something about her that you couldn’t say no to. I appreciated that she cared about my vagina; someone had to. If it weren’t for her, I’d probably have cobwebs and end up an old maid. I wasn’t convinced I’d ever find a man who would want to take me on.
One kid was hard enough.
Two brought it to a whole different level.
Why would any man want to carry all that baggage?
Especially when there were millions of women who didn’t have kids. There was no dating for me. I had one boyfriend in all my life, and he turned out to be the biggest douchebag ever. Don’t get me wrong, I wanted to fall in love.
Be in a committed relationship.
Get married.
Have more babies.
I wanted the white picket fence, the storybook happily ever after. Mostly, I wanted my twins to have a dad. One who would love them as if they were his own. Haven and Haiden asked me about their dad every chance they got, but there wasn’t much I could tell them other than they didn’t need him.
They had me.
My family.
Aspyn.
They were loved and cherished. As hard as it was to be a teen mom, I couldn’t imagine my life without them. We were a package deal, end of story.
I didn’t have much faith for tonight; however, at least I’d have an adult conversation.
And maybe, just maybe, I’d get lucky and have…
The Fling.
Chapter 7
—Sage—
We walked into a bar that had tables set up perfectly for everyone to rotate in the same direction. We had three minutes to have a speed date with someone, and then at the end, you decided if you had chemistry with anyone. If you did, you could take it further than a couple of minutes. Just when I thought this was ridiculous and you couldn’t have sparks with someone in three minutes, my memory proved me wrong.
“I’m Ashton.”
“I don’t think I’ve ever met an Ashton.”
“What can I say? I’m one of a kind.”
You could say that again…
“Here.” Aspyn set a tray of tequila shots in front of me.
“If I drink six shots right now, the only speed date I’m going to be having is with the porcelain God.”