“Well, you seemed to forgive him long enough to have his tongue down your throat.”
“Gross.”
“Can you think of a better way to phrase it?”
“We...fooled around,” I finally say, but that doesn’t really seem to do it justice. What we did was so much more than that.
Shit.
What we did was magical.
“I don’t want to like him,” I tell her.
“So you’re wrestling with your own desires. You think it’s wrong that you like him.”
“He’s been a bully to me for a long time.”
“Yeah,” she nods. “He’s been pretty brutal.”
“That’s it?”
“I’m not sure what you want me to say, Emilia. He’s a total jerk. He’s been cruel and mean and derisive. He’s been bad for you.”
“I got mad at him...you know, after we were done.”
“Why?”
“Because for a little while, it felt like I was hanging out with the old Gavin, from long ago.”
“You got scared,” she finally points out, and I don’t say anything for a minute because I don’t want to. I don’t want to admit that yeah, I was scared. I was scared of him and scared of my feelings and scared that I was going to do even more with him because I wanted to.
“A little.”
“It’s because you’re a virgin, isn’t it?”
“I’m not a virgin.”
Karen rolls her eyes so hard I think they’re going to pop out of her head.
“Of course you are.”
“Why would you say that?”
“Because I’m not an idiot, Emilia, and neither is he. You need to talk to him about what happened.”
“Yeah,” I sigh. She’s right. I need to talk with him. I should probably apologize for the way I ran out on him.
I definitely need to explain a couple of things.
But first...there’s someone I need to talk to first.
And I’m dreading it.
Chapter 9
Gavin
I MANAGE TO MAKE IT through my classes without talking to Emilia all day. It’s easy because apparently, she said she was sick and couldn’t come in. Her friend, Karen, catches my eye a few times, but she always looks away.