Starboard (Anchored 1)

“How old are you, Christina?” His question surprises me, but I answer him.

“27,” I tell him. Then, realizing we’re having a conversation, I decided to join in. “What about you?”

“A little bit older,” he admits. “34.”

“That’s not too old.”

“Thank you,” he chuckles gently and then his hand moves from my back to my hair, and he starts running his hands through it. I can’t help myself. I let out a soft noise that sounds almost like a purr. It just feels so good, so incredible. I don’t want him to ever stop touching me.

And this, I realize, is what I’ve been missing from the submission experience.

I give to my Doms, but I don’t let them give back to me.

I take care of them, but I refuse their care for myself.

No wonder Mistress D doesn’t want to play with me anymore.

“What’s your job?” Zack speaks again.

“I work at a daycare,” I tell him.

“That sounds like an interesting job. Do you enjoy being around children?”

“Yes,” I tell him honestly. I don’t tell him that Cameron and I wanted more children, that we’d been trying when he died. I don’t say that working with other people’s children is a small comfort as I realize I’ll never have a big family. I don’t tell him that I love my daughter so much it hurts, and that I like knowing she gets to spend time with other kids because she’ll never have siblings.

“I’m a lawyer,” Zack offers freely.

“Do you keep the bad guys out of jail?” I ask, suddenly feeling a little snarky. Zack laughs again, but keeps touching my hair, and I wiggle closer to him.

“Careful,” he says. “You’re just going to get me excited with all that wiggling.” I realize what he means because I feel his hardness beneath my butt.

“Oh,” I whisper. “Sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry. You’re very beautiful, Christina. Surely you know how you affect the people around you. And to answer your question, I do not keep the bad guys out of jail, nor do I send them there. I’m not that kind of lawyer.”

“What kind of lawyer are you?”

“I’m in real estate law.”

“Is it a fun job?”

“I meet a lot of interesting people,” he says, and then he starts talking about his work. The conversation flows easily, and I ask him questions about his job, and he tells me. Before I know it, I’m starting to feel good.

Really good.

I’m starting to feel calm, and taken care of, and protected.

“All right,” he says after awhile. “How are you feeling now?”

“Pretty good,” I admit.

“Can you see now why aftercare is important?” He asks.

Blushing, I manage to nod, but don’t say anything.

“Christina,” Zack sighs and tilts my head up so I’m looking at him. His eyes are beautiful, and I want to drown in them in this moment. “You’re sweet, but you need to make sure you’re taking care of yourself. If you don’t have a regular partner, you need to make sure you’re choosing people who are going to take care of you after a scene. It’s not safe for a sub to come down from that high alone.”

“I know,” I whisper, embarrassed.