Hush, Hush (Hush, Hush 1)

She pops a bottle of champagne and makes us mimosas. Then we take our drinks to the couch and get cozy under a shared blanket.

"I'm beginning to think Christine should make the men take a breathalyzer test before every job."

She frowns. "Why?"

"Last night, my client…" I sigh dramatically. "He wobbled when he walked and was so fucking drunk that he was flicking his cigarette ashes into his sparkling pink wine and then drinking from it. It was disgusting, Nat. I'm sure he saw the look on my face because there was no way to hide my repulsion. I tried to get him to ash into something else, but he wasn't even making any sense and seemed content, so I let it go. He smoked—and then drank—a lot of cigarettes."

"That's Clive," she says, then casually takes a sip.

My eyes widen. "You've had him?"

"We've all had him."

My face pinches up in repugnance. "So this is a regular thing for him?"

Natalie nods but doesn't seem bothered.

"From what I hear, he lost his entire family during a home invasion many years ago. It was gruesome, and he's never been the same since. He’s totally harmless, though. Honestly. I bet you didn't have to do any sex shit, did you?"

I shake my head. "No. I was surprised."

"He doesn't ever sleep with any of the girls or want sexual shit in return. He just wants someone to ramble to."

My heart softens a bit for him at that. "That's kind of sad."

"Yeah, he's a soft teddy bear and just never got over what happened to his family. I don't blame him."

I purse my lips. "Now I feel bad. I shouldn't have judged him. He was showing me picture after picture, but I couldn’t understand what he was saying. Now I know they were of his family."

"Don't. We all were like that at first. Next time you'll know what to do. Just act really interested in his family and he will be so happy." She tips the glass back, drinking the rest of the contents. "How’s it going with Daniel? Lover boy giving you any good bonings?"

I look down at the bubbles in my glass. Three months of "good bonings" and I still think about James. There was just something magnetic about him that I can’t quite explain. Like one of those kismet moments that I’ll remember for the rest of time. And I didn’t even get to fuck him.

"I think I'm going to break it off with him."

"Not that I ever thought dating was a good idea in the first place, but what made you change your mind?"

"I don't want to get too comfortable, and I know he wouldn't be okay with a girl who turns tricks for a living, not that I blame him. It's probably best if we go our separate ways, that way he won't find out."

There’s not a doubt in my mind that he wouldn't be okay with it even one client, much less the sixty-one clients I’ve had since I started dating him. Considering he’s still sore about his ex-fiancée, he would see me as cheating on him.

"It's probably for the best."

"Yeah," I say. All I feel is hesitation when I sit and think about it. I don't know what's preventing me from actually doing it.

Natalie's phone rings. "Hey, Mom," she answers.

I pick up my phone and scroll through social media while Natalie talks on the phone, grateful not to have to talk about Daniel anymore. He's a good guy and I'm a terrible girlfriend, and acknowledging that makes me want to climb into a gutter where I belong. Maybe she'll want to go shopping in a little while and then go with me to Pilates later.

"I love that idea," she says, then frowns. "Ah…" She nudges me and I look up to find her eyes narrowed at me. "Yeah, well, I had plans that night with my friend, Aubrey. Maybe she can come too? You'll finally get to meet her."

I frown, lowering my phone. We don't have any plans coming up, not any that I can remember at least.

"Valentine's Day at La Grenouille it is. So romantic," she says, her voice syrupy. She hangs up and I stare at her in question.

"What did you just agree to?" I ask.

She huffs and makes a face, then stands up. She takes both of our glasses and refills them, then sits back down next to me.