Hush, Hush (Hush, Hush 1)

"I guess the actual divorce doesn't bother me? I don't know. I'm not a child, I can see things differently. I wouldn’t want to be locked in a marriage I don't want to be in. Shit. I don't ever want to get married, to be honest. It just sucks all around."

I frown, agreeing with her, and give her a hug. I wonder if James would've still filed for divorce if I hadn’t come into his life. Their marriage wasn't ideal from what he'd told me, they didn't see eye to eye or have the same interests in much, but I still don't like the thought of being responsible for them separating.

But I am the reason. I know I am, and it kills me. Now that James and I are through, I hope our secret stays buried forever.

Natalie eyes me and I hold my breath. I decide to change the subject. "Daniel asked me to move in with him."

Her jaw drops. "Are you going to?"

I hesitate, shrugging. "I don't know. I feel like I should, but it’s for purely selfish reasons. I want to…"

"But you don't love him, do you?" she finishes.

I shake my head. My phone rings, and dread fills my stomach. I hope it isn't James at a time like this. "Let me grab that real quick."

I run into my bedroom before the ringing stops and pick up my phone, frowning at the unknown number.

"Hello?"

"Ms. Abrams?"

"Yes?"

Sitting on the edge of my bed with the phone clutched in my hand, my stomach

cramping with the worst fear of my life. I stare blankly ahead, in shock listening to the doctor at Jamaica Hospital tell me I need to come in. My heart is pounding in my chest, beating so hard it hurts. One of Grammy's cats rubs up against the back of my arm. I reach for it, bringing it close to my heart.

"Aub?" Natalie says, walking into my room.

My eyes shift to hers and she looks at me with concern. Quietly, I say, "The hospital called. They want me to come in to go over her test results."

Her frown deepens. "They can call you and ask you to do that?"

I nod. "Grammy has me listed on her medical papers in case anything happens. She's fine right now, but the doctor wants to go over her results with me." I swallow back the tears rising to the surface. Something isn't right, I can feel it in my bones.

The cat purrs against my neck, rubbing its head on me as if it knows I need support. It's the nicest cat, except when it wants to sleep on my chest in the middle of the night. I glance down at it, deciding I'm going to sneak the fury little beast into the hospital. I know for sure Grammy will be upset too, so maybe seeing her cat will help her.

It took about two hours to buy an animal duffle bag to conceal the pet and get to the hospital, but I'm finally sitting next to my grammy at her bedside. She knows why I'm here. I'm trying to be optimistic before we speak to anyone, but it's difficult when I take in the yellow coloring of her eyes and how pale she looks.

"Grammy, I have a surprise for you," I say, reaching down by my feet. I unzip the bag. Lowering my voice to a whisper, which is stupid because no one else is in her private room with us, I say, "I smuggled your cat in."

She starts laughing and her face lights up. Right there, that moment, that look, is worth the risk of getting caught. To see her smile and her eyes dance with happiness that I can feel, it's everything to me.

"Does the hospital know?" she asks quietly.

"Heck no."

She giggles. I lift the cat and stand to hand it to her. The white fur ball with blue eyes curls up against her and nestles into her arm. I smile seeing the love the two have for each other as I sit down.

"Oh, Aubrey. This is the best surprise you could've given me," she says, her voice shaky but I try not to think about it too much. "I wish she could stay with me. It's lonely at night."

My heart aches for her. "I told you I would stay the night."

"No." She shoots me down. "You have school and work. I'll be fine here. I'm not really alone anyway with the nurses pricking me every few hours for blood." She pets the cat lovingly. "Isn't graduation coming up?"

I nod. I know she's changing the subject and I let it slide.

"It's a little over a month away. You better be out of this hospital and there with me. I'm looking forward to taking a few shots with you afterward."