Right. Real soon.
By the time I headed to the kitchen, I was feeling better. I heard Kara’s defiant tone, and I knew she was talking about Cameron.
“Not anymore. I think I’m moving on,” she spat out.
Caleb sighed. “I know he still loves you.”
“It doesn’t matter when he can’t… Did he tell you that?”
Caleb looked indecisive, as if he was carefully weighing what to tell Kara. “No, but from the looks of him yesterday, he was in really bad shape.”
She snorted. “Good.” She looked down and gripped her coffee cup in her palms. “But that’s not enough for me anymore, Caleb. I need more than that. I can’t wait for him forever.”
“I think he really needs a friend right now, but he won’t let me in.” He sighed. “I think you’re the only one he’ll let in, Kar.”
She shook her head vehemently. “Look, Caleb—”
“Kar, he’s not okay.”
She closed her eyes tightly, a tear rolling down her cheek.
“Don’t give up on him when he needs you most,” Caleb pleaded.
Silently, I walked to Kara, laying my hand on her shoulder for comfort. When she opened her eyes and made eye contact with me, she broke down.
There was nothing I could do but stay by her side.
Chapter Nineteen
Caleb
“How was your night?” I asked Red as I drove us to school. I wondered if she would remember the conversation we’d had last night. I didn’t expect her to, but I really wanted to know.
She looked at me from beneath her lashes, shaking her head. I caught the playful smile on her lips before she turned her head away and looked out the window.
This felt good. This felt like we were starting to create our own routine. That was good, right?
I was thinking of brushing up on girlfriend-boyfriend rules. Maybe I could ask Cameron, but then I remembered he sucked at relationships. Maybe my brother, Ben?
Oh, wait. He sucked too.
I racked my brain for any of my friends who had a long-term relationship, and I realized with shame that I had none. They were all like me, unless I counted Andrei, who had been with his girlfriend for two years now. But theirs was an open relationship. Screw that.
I wanted Red to be mine only.
I knew I was being possessive, maybe even overbearing, but…I didn’t know how to be anything else.
I just hoped she would accept all of it—all of me.
How the mighty have fallen! I thought to myself. Caleb Lockhart, clueless on how to make a girl fall in love with him.
Love.
Wait, what?
Damn.
I shook my head. I was never one to hide my emotions. What was the point of having feelings if you couldn’t admit to them, even to yourself? All I knew was that I had never felt this way before with anyone else…and it felt really good. Like something I could hold on to for a long time.