Don't Call Me Daddy

“For now.” I nod. “But you’ll be gone soon.”

“What if I came back?” She takes a drink of her Red Bull and puts it down. “All I need to do is get my stuff. It isn't like I owe my friend anything; she totally abandoned me last night.”

I should tell her no. I should push her away now when I have the chance. We shared something, but it hasn’t gone too far—not yet.

I don’t know how to push away the only person who has made me feel like breathing something other than my own misery in so long I barely remember the man I used to be.

“How long are you planning to stay in the city?” I tilt my head inquisitively.

“The room is paid for until Sunday, provided that she didn’t check out and get a refund. I don’t have to be back at work until Monday.” She shrugs. “How long would you like me to stay?”

What a loaded fucking question.

“Let’s find somewhere with better accommodations than my office.” I nod. “My apartment isn’t far from here. I could make dinner for you tonight.”

“Okay.” She smiles and reaches for her phone. “What’s your address?”

I give it to her, along with my phone number. I’ve sealed my fate. One more night with her is practically guaranteed now. Who knows where that will lead, or what it will mean when she has to leave on Sunday morning. I like the way I feel when I’m around her. Her smile is infectious. It makes me feel like a man again, as ridiculous as that sounds in my head.

“I guess I should go.” Ainsley reaches for her purse.

“I’ll walk you to your hotel.” I stand up and use the window as a mirror so I can adjust my shirt.

“You don’t have to. I’ll be fine.” She waves me off.

“I need to stretch my legs anyway.” I motion to the door. “After you. We do need to stop by the break room and check out your hand before we go.”

“It doesn’t really hurt now.” She shrugs.

“Let me take a look at it to be sure.” I walk toward the break room, and she follows me.

Ainsley’s hand looks a lot better this morning, but I take the time to c

lean and put fresh gauze on it to be safe. It doesn’t even look like it’s going to leave a scar.

“All better.” I smile and nod. “Ready to go?”

“Yep.” She picks up her purse and walks to the door.

I have no idea what the fuck I’m doing. Ainsley is young enough to be my daughter. Hell, both of my kids are older than she is. This is crazy in every sense of the word. I gave Bram so much shit, and I’m walking in the same damn footsteps. I just don’t want to stop.

I lost my way so long ago, and this is the first time I’ve felt like putting one foot in front of the other, because I know that each step brings me closer to seeing Ainsley again tonight. I should be better than this, but the world has kicked me in the balls so many times that it’s hard to ignore something that is finally going my way. It’s fucking impossible to ignore the gorgeous girl walking beside me.

“See, I told you it wasn’t far.” She motions to her hotel.

“I still feel better seeing that you made it here safe.” I nod.

“I’ll see you tonight.” She turns to me and smiles.

“Yep.” I nod again.

Ainsley walks into the lobby, and I feel an immediate absence when she’s out of sight. I can either beat myself up about this all fucking day or try to enjoy what little time I have left with her.

Maybe this is what I need to jumpstart my entire fucking life. I know I’ve been a sack of shit and treated the people I love like they don’t matter at all. Should I have to suffer until the bitter end because I was a terrible husband and an awful father? I’ve certainly done everything I can to bring myself to that end as fast as possible.

It’s time to open my fucking eyes. I used to be happy once.

I think I want to be that man again.