Don't Call Me Daddy
Page 43
SMACK! SMACK! SMACK! SMACK! SMACK! SMACK! SMACK! SMACK! SMACK! SMACK!
“Ow!” I wince. The spanking is harder than the last one.
SMACK! SMACK! SMACK! SMACK! SMACK!
“I’m sorry, Daddy!” I whimper and feel tears start to well up in my eyes.
No response from Lawson. Just the sound of his hand landing on my skin.
SMACK! SMACK! SMACK! SMACK! SMACK!
This spanking hurts. I’m not in the right place mentally for it. He threw me for a loop when he said he was my daddy. It isn't what I imagined because the desire isn’t getting pulled to the surface like it did before when we were having fun in a somewhat playful environment.
SMACK! SMACK! SMACK! SMACK! SMACK! SMACK! SMACK! SMACK! SMACK! SMACK!
“Okay, that’s enough! Please!” I throw one hand back to try to block his while my other hand wipes away a tear.
Lawson lets go of the grip he has on my waist, and I pull away from him. I feel embarrassed and confused. The expression on his face resonates the exact same thing. Everything is so wrong emotionally. I don’t know why or how to explain it to him.
“Give me a minute.” I pull my dress down and walk toward the door.
“Wait, Ainsley…” Lawson stands up. “Talk to me.”
“I’m sorry.” I shake my head and wave him off.
I leave the bedroom and lock myself in the bathroom. The tears stream down my face immediately. They’re not driven by pain; the spanking didn’t last long enough to make me cry like this. It’s a pure emotional eruption without proper cause.
I craved punishment. Real punishment. That was exactly what he was giving me. He was even letting me call him Daddy. I was excited at first, but then it just didn’t work. I feel like an absolute mess. I don’t even understand my own fantasies or what kind of desires I have. That was supposed to be my ultimate fantasy, but it turned sour once I got trapped in it.
“Ainsley, you can talk to me.” Lawson gently knocks on the door.
Despite the emotional sundering I’m dealing with, it doesn’t seem fair to close myself off from Lawson. I stand, unlock the door, and sit on the edge of the bathtub.
“I’m really sorry.” I look up at him as he walks in.
“Don’t apologize.” He shakes his head and sits in front of me. “Tell me what happened. Did I do something wrong?”
“No, it wasn’t what I thought it would be.” I look down and sigh.
“What were you expecting, exactly? I’ll be honest, I wasn’t sure myself. I tried to do what you asked for.” He wipes away my tears and moves closer.
“It was, but it was different than I imagined.” I lean forward and rest my head on his shoulder.
Lawson wraps his arms around me, and I melt into his embrace. He holds me for a while. Neither one of us say a word. His embrace seems to drive away all the confusion in my head. The desire that retreated begins to come back, and it brings clarity with it. I start to understand what was missing, what was different. This was supposed to be a fantasy, but it was too real because of all the guilt I felt.
“Thank you.” I sigh.
“For what?” He leans back. “I don’t believe I deserve a thank you after what happened in the bedroom.”
“You do.” I nod. “You were willing to try it, and you didn’t get upset when I panicked. You just … kept being amazing.”
“I didn’t feel very amazing when you ran away from me.” He raises an eyebrow.
“I think I imagined it differently. When we were in the office earlier, it was a lot more playful and fun. Even the serious parts, if that makes sense…” I let out a softer sigh.
“You liked Principal Brooks a lot more than Daddy, huh?” He tilts his head slightly.
“I wouldn’t mind a Daddy that is like Principal Brooks.” I finally smile.