They were beautiful words but that’s all they were and would fade away with the morning sun. “No. We are so over that someone should come up with a new word for over.”
Hearing myself tell him that we were over was the breaking dam holding my tears inside. I turned to leave and he staggered forward and caught me by my waist from behind. He pulled me close and I could feel his hot, drunken breath against the back of my neck, sending chills all over my body. I couldn’t help myself from leaning back against him because even under the present circumstances, he still had the power to make me want him.
He held me tight and I let him. I needed to have him close, even if it was only for a minute before I let him go forever.
He pushed my hair away from my neck and brought his mouth to my ear. Even with him standing behind me, the smell of beer on his breath was stout. “Can’t you see I would do anything to be your everything?”
“My everything wouldn’t be having babies with other girls.” I felt a sob building in my throat. “So since I’m not your everything, how about I’ll be nothing at all to you?”
He kissed the back of my neck and rubbed his hands over my stomach. “You are my everything and I don’t want babies with anyone but you. I want to put them inside you and then watch them grow right here.”
I laced my fingers through his and savored the moment briefly before I pushed his hands away. “You’re drunk.”
He turned me around to face him and his eyes were glazed over. “I may be drunk, but I know exactly what I’m saying. I want to marry you and have lots of babies...little blond headed ones with honey eyes just like their mother.”
He started kissing my neck and I felt myself melting under his touch. He lifted me onto the hood of my car and then pressed his body against my parted legs. “I love you, Payton, and I don’t want to live without you.”
This was his game and he was damn good at it so I had to get away before I gave in and got naked with him in the backseat of my car. I pushed him away and slid off the hood. “No, we’re not doing that. You’re not gonna kiss me and turn me on to make me forget what you’ve done. You have a baby out there with another girl. That’s a problem for me because I’m going to be the one to give my husband his first child. Me, not some random whore.”
I opened my car door and got inside. “I should have known when you swept me off my feet that I was in the perfect position for you to drop me on my ass.”
28 Chokehold
Nick
I just watched my whole world drive away.
I walked back inside the pool hall and went back to the table where my buddies were sitting. They looked at me waiting for an explanation, but I didn’t have one to give them.“Everything okay?”
No, nothing was okay without Payton in my life. I stared blankly at the beer I had not finished when she came in. Why had she come here? Had she come to talk things over and then changed her mind when she saw Samantha in my lap kissing me?
Luke snapped his fingers in front of my face. “What happened, Dude?”
Samantha walked up to our table looking like the cat that swallowed the canary. “Please, allow me to explain, boys.”
I stared dumbfounded at her. I had no idea what she was about to announce, but it was clearly making her happy. “The Playah got played. That’s what happened. I set you up, Nick.”
“What are you talking about?”
She motioned across the room. “I believe you met my cousin, Brandi, earlier today.”
I turned around and saw the girl that was at my house claiming to be the mother of a baby belonging to me. “You’re cousins?”
“Tell me Nick, what does it say about one’s character when a complete stranger shows up at your door and tells you they had your baby and you don’t know the difference because you’ve screwed so many girls?”
“I’ve never met her?
“Luckily for Brandi, no.”
“Why would you do this?”
“You screwed me and I returned the favor. Do you need me to elaborate further on that?”
I slammed my palm against the table and made the beer mugs clank against the surface. “You just caused me to lose the only girl I have ever loved.”
“Luckily for me, she thinks the worst of you and wouldn’t believe you or these tools you call friends if you told her what actually happened. So, take some time to reflect upon your feelings and do a little soul searching. You might find that you might have one after all.”
≈ ≈ ≈
My head was killing me and I definitely needed to take something for it, but what could I take for the pain of losing Payton? There was only one cure for that and it was unobtainable because she believed I had a baby with a stranger and I had no way of proving otherwise.
I heard a gentle knock on my door, so I knew it was Dallas. “Come in.”
She was the one they called to come get me at the pool hall last night and I knew she was checking in on me because she saw how plastered I was. She slowly opened the door and came in with two pain killers and a glass of water. “I thought you might need these this morning.”
She was always so thoughtful. Thank God she wasn’t like Jake. “Thanks, my head is pounding.”
“Do you want to talk about what happened?”
I explained about the girl and her accusation on down to how Samantha had set the whole thing up. “Dallie, I have no way of proving I didn’t get this girl pregnant because there isn’t going to be paternity papers saying I didn’t.”
“Just tell Payton the truth.”
“I tried to tell her about Samantha last night and she didn’t believe me. She knows what she saw and I can’t convince her otherwise. She’s definitely not going to believe me about that baby.”
“So, you’re just going to give up? Just like that?”
“What other choice do I have? I can’t prove anything so I should face reality. My past just put my future in a chokehold and snuffed the life out of it.”
≈ ≈ ≈
It had been a week, 7 whole days, since I saw Payton and I had never been more miserable in my life. If I had any sense, I would stop asking Dane about her when he came to see Dallas, but I guess I was a masochist in that way and I just couldn’t stop myself.
I didn’t even have to ask him anymore. He automatically had a report waiting for me each time he came to the house and tonight was no different.
She wasn’t seeing anyone and that helped my feelings minimally. Dallas was getting fed up with Dane’s reports because she thought I was being a dumb ass about the whole thing. “You’re an idiot. Stop asking him about her if you’re not going to try to get her back.”