…Forever and ever
…this life and the one after.”
My eyes pop open and I realize I’m lying on my back, having sent the pillow God knows where, and my entire body feels loose and boneless. I look back down between my legs to see Bennett gazing up at me, the lower half of his face still wet with my arousal, and a smile across his face.
“Holy shit,” I whisper.
“Holy shit,” he repeats, “did you black out?”
“I…” I’m suddenly freezing, a shiver shooting through my body, and I don’t know if it’s just because I’m feeling vulnerable after that flashback, but I push my shirt down over my sex and move my legs from around him.
“Hey, what’s wrong?” he asks as he moves up the bed and sits next to me. He rubs his mouth before he licks his lips and then I’m in his arms, his hand stroking my back.
“I…I don’t know what that was.” I grab his left hand, rubbing my finger over his wedding band.
“Let’s get your rings later, okay?” He presses his lips to my temple and my sex pulses when I smell my arousal on his face. “When you get home from work, we’ll go over to my apartment? I assume you know where it is?”
I nod, not looking up at him, my eyes still fixated on his ring.
“Are you ready to wear them?” he asks me and I press my face into his neck, not wanting to leave this embrace ever.
“I…I don’t know. I think I’m confused…” I press my hands to my face. “I’m sorry. I’m not trying to jerk you around,” I whisper. “In here…yes. I’m reminded of how things were and I want them again…” I look at the window. “But so much has happened. We’re sixty days from our divorce being final…”
“We call it off.”
“Your mom still hates me.”
“I’ll deal with my mother.”
“She’s a problem, Bennett, and it’s not just going to miraculously fix itself because you want me back.”
“I said I’ll deal with her.”
I sigh. “You were with another woman.” I look up at him. “That kills me.”
“You were with another man. You think that doesn’t kill me?” He responds quickly and I can see the pain all over his face.
“That’s not even a little bit fair, Bennett.” I struggle to get out of his arms and he lets me go. I begin to pace my bedroom. “You left me first.”
“What do you want me to say, Olivia? I don’t fucking remember that.”
“Well, maybe it would be easier if you did.”
“Why? What would make me remembering that I cheated on you any better?”
The words make me wince, not because they’re particularly harsh, but hearing them just makes for an unbearable pain in my chest. “I’m surprised your girlfriend hasn’t tried to track you down.” I frown when I remember that he hadn’t been able to get into his phone since the accident.
“Ashley is irrelevant,” Bennett snaps.
“Amanda,” I correct him.
“Do you think I give a fuck?” He gets up and stands in front of me. “Do you still love me?”
“Bennett…” I trail off.
“Yes or no.” I’m silent and he takes a step back. “Yes or no?” he repeats.
“It’s complicated.”