“She’s not being bratty,” I snap without thinking. I’m always defensive when it comes to Maddie and rarely let anyone discipline her. Aria is the very small exception and even that needs to be cleared through me. “She doesn’t like being blindsided. You know that.”
Aria narrows her eyes at me, and I immediately try to clear my brain of the last few days as if she could read the crude thoughts that I’ve been having about Maddie. I should relax though, never in a million years would Aria ever come to that conclusion. “You let that girl have too much power.”
True. “That’s not what this is about.”
“Oh? You’re flying off the handle because of Maddie’s reaction. You spoil her.”
“And you don’t?”
She runs a hand through her hair before putting it up. “That’s not the point. The point is you let her have too much say in your life. You always have.”
“That’s what it means to raise a child, Aria. You put them fucking first.” The instant the words leave my mouth, I regret them. Not because I didn’t mean them. And God knows I do. I do put Maddie first. But to think of her as a child makes my stomach turn. I’ve been trying to rationalize my choices since the moment I pressed my lips to hers, and now the voice of reason is loud and abrasive and slithering up my spine and grabbing hold of my senses. I storm away from her and up the stairs to my room, not even bothering to go in the kitchen to excuse myself.
You’re sick, Cal. You’re hurting Maddie for your own selfish gain. Where’s this going? Are you going to marry her? Fuck her? Breed her? That will go over really well with your family and everyone in town that considers you a hero for what you did for the poor broken orphan. All of my hard work and recognition and accolades will be tarnished. They’ll think I touched her when she was too young to know better.
They’ll think I raped her.
And let’s just say for argument’s sake that no one ever finds out. I manage to keep it from everyone until this relationship or whatever it is plays its course. Then what happens? We go back to the way things were?
No. The relationship I had with Maddie before we started all of this is over. We can’t go back to that. Not after kissing her and touching her and…tasting her.
Fuck.
Sounds of sniffling break me out of my thoughts and before I can tell myself that this is the worst idea, I’m closing the door to Maddie’s room behind me. “Go away, Cal. I can’t do this with everyone downstairs. Not with your girlfriend down there.”
“She’s not my girlfriend and you know that,” I tell her as I sit down on her bed next to her. “I’ve never known you to be insecure. You know you’re my number one girl.” I’m trying to keep my hands off of her, but her crying makes me feel like someone has wrapped barbed wire around my heart and every time she sniffles my heart constricts and the wire tightens.
She wipes her eyes and avoids my gaze. “It’s different now.”
“So, let me get this straight, now that we’re…
here, you think that you mean less to me than you did before?” I raise an eyebrow at her and her watery blue eyes meet mine.
“She’s…pretty.”
“She’s not…you.”
She gasps slightly, air moves through her slightly parted lips and her cheeks turn pink. Her tongue darts out to wet her mouth and I shake my head slightly. “Later,” I whisper.
“Please,” she whimpers, “just for a second.”
I swallow, and in that moment, I damn my soul to the pits of hell. I free the beast from the confines of his cage, letting him run wild and free to take what he needed. I don’t care about what my family would say, what my job would say, what anyone would say. I’m certain that Maddie is mine. That despite the tragedy in her past that brought us together way earlier than I would have liked, she was meant for me. And she is going to have to go downstairs and watch another woman flirt with me.
I would give her this and whatever else she needs later.
I put her face in my hands, cupping her cheeks gently. “Hey, look at me.” She does instantly, as if her body has been trained to obey my every command. I rub my nose gently against hers, inhaling her sweet scent. I let my tongue dart out and trace her bottom lip, then her top lip before I press mine to hers, swallowing a delicious moan that makes my cock twitch. I pull away after no more than a second, not wanting to get carried away. “Wait five minutes before you come downstairs.” I stand up and open the door before I peek my head into the hall, grateful that no one is upstairs. I can hear rattling in the kitchen and Henry and Aria talking and I’m certain that Grant is still glued to my sofa.
She nods before she stands up and wraps her arms around me. “I love you.” She looks up at me and gives me that smile that makes my heart stop. The smile reaches her eyes and her sweet dimple pops out. I haven’t explicitly told her I loved her since we’d crossed these lines, but I hope she knows. I hope she knows with every kiss, every touch, every moment I risk my entire life just to hold her in my arms in a way I knew I shouldn’t, I hope she knows that I’d give up everything to love her forever.
THE TENSION IS SO THICK it smothers us like a weighted blanket. Things are always pretty tense whenever Grant and Henry are in the same room, but usually just the right amount of alcohol can loosen that situation. Unlucky for all of us, Henry hasn’t hit that sweet spot yet, so he is still brooding at the end of the table. I’ve never really understood why Henry hates Grant so much. From what I can see, he’s a good man that has treated Margie like a queen after their father left her heartbroken. I’ve always liked him, and from the jump, he has always been sweet to me. He’d helped Cal pick out my first car and anytime I saw him he was practically shoving money in my pocket.
On top of the usual “you’re not my Daddy and I’ll never like you” tension between Henry and Grant, I’m grappling with my own issues of having this outsider at dinner. I’m trying my best not to appear like the jealous girlfriend, but I’m pretty sure I’m failing miserably.
But really, why is she here? I stare across the table at her and cock my head to the side. She is really pretty, but she looks completely over the top for a Thanksgiving dinner, making me believe that she’s here for more than just “Aria’s friend with nowhere to go.”
She wants Cal.
Her strawberry blonde hair is pulled up into a top knot with a few strands hanging. She’s wearing a face full of makeup complete with a deep plum lipstick and overly done smoky eye. She’s wearing a long sweater over a pair of leggings and heeled boots that make her legs go on for days, and she towers over me.