Our Way

“Look at your tan,” Jolie gushes. “You look so refreshed.”

“It was fantastic and I am so refreshed.”

The waitress comes over. “Can I take your order?” I quickly scan the choices.

“I’ll have a Greek salad with poached chicken, and a mineral water, please,” I say.

“Oh, me, too,” Jolie says.

“Me, three,” Brooke pipes in. “But can I have a Diet Coke instead?”

“Sure thing.” The waitress leaves us alone.

We chat for a few minutes about Majorca and what’s been going on back here.

I turn to my friends; how do I word this…. I’ll start with deflection, “Um, how is Santiago?”

“Don’t encourage her.” Brooke scoffs.

Jolie rolls her eyes. “You get yourself some sex that is this good and then you can compare, okay?”

“Is it really good?” I smirk.

“I’m not even fucking joking, Eliza.” She grabs my hand across the table. “My legs are jelly for half an hour after sex because the orgasms are so good. I can’t even get up to go to the toilet.”

“Does he film you while you go to the toilet?” Brooke asks, deadpan.

“No, but he did ask me to pee on him the other night.”

“Oh God,” Brooke cries. “What the fuck?”

I burst out laughing. “Are you serious?”

The waitress puts our drinks onto the table. “Thank you,” we all reply.

“You know, like squirting.” Jolie shrugs.

Brooke’s eyes widen as she leans closer. “What do you mean, like squirting?”

“Don’t tell me you don’t know what squirting is?” Jolie whispers. “Who are you? Motherfucking Theresa?” She turns her attention to me. “You know squirting, don’t you?”

“Yes.” I frown. “Everyone knows what squirting is, but I do think that actual real squirting is different to porn squirting.”

Jolie points her fork at me. “Right, so do I. There lies the question.”

Brooke frowns as she looks between us. “What are you talking about?”

Our salads are put on the table in front of us. “Thanks.”

I continue explaining, “So, some women, when they orgasm, squirt their come out of their pussy.”

Brooke screws up her face in disgust. “What… like a clamshell?”

Jolie and I laugh. “Yes, exactly.”

“But in porn,” I explain, “women piss while they are taking it up the ass, or they piss while they are getting fucked.”

“Why on earth would someone want to piss while they fuck?” Brooke whispers, mortified. “That’s just fucking wrong, and who’s cleaning the goddamn sheets?”