She deserved better than I gave her.
I don’t k
now how my life turned out the way it did. I was in love with two women.
My beloved wife and my devoted soul mate.
The three of us suffered, but Angelina ultimately sacrificed the most.
How could fate be so cruel?
The day Giuliano was born, my heart sang with happiness.
The joy that he brought to my Angelina was indescribable.
My biggest regret in all of this is that he didn’t get to grow up with his brothers. Enrico, when I look at him, I see you.
Brave, strong, and loyal.
I love you, son… more than you could ever know.
I drop my head as the tears roll down my face.
I hate to admit it but I can relate to this story. It was almost my own.
I sit and stare at the bookcase in front of me as I try and prepare myself to read on.
You may ask why I didn’t tell you any of this, Enrico.
The answer is simple: it changes you. It changes every part of who you think you are. Knowing that your family’s money comes from crime, knowing that your father has committed adultery for all of your life… it’s soul destroying.
Trust me, I know first-hand.
I was eleven years old when I found out about the family business. I was eleven years old when I witnessed my first murder. I was eleven years old when Stefano brought his mistresses into my life and paraded them in front of me as if I should be proud. There were multiple women—too many to remember. Sometimes three or four at once. This was his normal. This was how he was brought up. This was how he was going to bring me up.
He had no respect for my mother or me. It changed who I was, and for a long time, I hated him for it.
I vowed that I would never let my sons be tainted and bitter the way I was.
I wanted my sons to be proud of who I was.
I’m not perfect.
I know I loved two women, Enrico. The three of us were victims of circumstance. I know that I am still a Ferrara.
But I hope you remember the good in me, and how much I loved you.
My face creases together as pain tears through me.
Please listen to what I am about to tell you. I know you will be angry, but I have my reasoning.
Giuliano does not know anything about my other life. Like you, I have tried to protect him. He knows me as Papa—his father who worked away for a few days a week. The one who idolized his mother.
Enrico, I need you to be the strong man I raised and step up and look after my beloved Angelina and Giuliano.
They are all alone.
I have taken precautions, and they have been guarded up until you find this letter, but they are now in your care.