“Stop it. You’re going to fucking kill him. Please let him go,” I sob out loud … ”Please, what do you want?” They start to kick him and I scream. “NO! You are going to kill him! Please stop it.” I sob while I fight the two men holding me as I try desperately to break free. They throw me onto the ground and one of them kicks me in the stomach. I scream in pain and I hear Joshua go crazy again as he tries to break free.
“Let her go,” he screams. “Kill me … just let her go. It’s me you want.”
They pick up a metal bar and hit him across the face.
“Nooooooooo!” I scream.
“We are not letting her go. Who will we take turns in fucking with her gone? There are nine of us to please, you know.”
Joshua goes crazy. “I’ll fucking kill you when I get free,” he screams. “I swear to god if you touch her, you gutless pricks, you’re fucking dead.”
I look to the corner where Ben’s dead body is slumped in the corner.
I close my eyes, the pain too much to bear. They continually hit him until he slips into unconsciousness.
Dear god, no!
One of them hits me hard across the face and I fall to the ground. They gather around and one of them unzips his pants.
“Joshua!” I scream. “No!” I struggle again as I try to break free. “Joshua!” I scream.
I am shaken awake. “Tash … baby, I’m here. It’s ok.”
My terrified eyes flick around the room as I sob and shake in fear. It was just a nightmare.
Joshua pulls me into an embrace. “You’re safe, it’s ok,” he whispers. “Jesus. What were you dreaming about?”
I sob into his chest as he cuddles me, and my eyes flick around the room again. We are in my lounge room. My body shakes with fear, and perspiration dampens my skin. My chest racks with sobs, why am I still having this horrible nightmare? What does it mean?
“Tash, talk to me. What were you dreaming about?” he whispers into the top of my head as he holds me tightly.
I sob again. “The one where they kill you and rape me,” I whisper.
He frowns. “The same dream you had in the hospital?”
I nod and start to wipe the tears from my face.
“How often do you have this dream?” he asks, horrified.
I shrug. “At least twice a week,” I whisper.
He frowns again. “What? You are this scared at least twice a week on your own, in the middle of the night?”
I nod as I drop my head in shame. “I feel like I am going crazy,” I whisper.
“Tash.” He pulls me back down to lie with him. “It’s ok. I’m not going to die and no one is going to rape you … no one, except me maybe.” He smiles as he kisses my forehead again.
I snuggle into his chest as my heartbeat starts to slow down. His t-shirt is wet from my tears. He idly starts to run his fingers through my hair as he thinks.
“When did these nightmares start?” he asks.
“Two days after Dad died,” I reply sadly.
“It’s not true, Tash. It’s just a dream. Nobody is going to get you. You are safe.”
I nod. “Josh, you are not safe—that crazy man is after you. What if it’s a premonition? What if they do get us? What if it’s Dad trying to send me a message through my dream?”
He tutts in sympathy. “Stop thinking like that. We have so much security around us no one can touch us.”