“I have groceries for the monkeys.”
“Say what?”
“Long story short is we found some of Gail Scanlon’s monkeys yesterday, and we stashed them in Munch’s house.”
“That’s just wrong,” Lula said. “They’re gonna poop all over.”
“It was me or Munch.”
“Okay I could see tha
t then.”
After a fast-?food drive-?through experience and five more traffic lights, I reached Crocker Street. I parked in the alley and took a bag of what I hoped was appropriate monkey food to the back door. I opened the unlocked door, we let ourselves in, and I set the bag on the kitchen counter.
“So far, so good,” Lula said. “No monkey poop in the kitchen. No monkeys, either, for that matter.”
I poked my head into the living room, where Carl was watching television.
“Where are the rest of the monkeys?” I asked him.
Carl put his hands over his ears and stared at the tele vision.
I walked through the house, looking in all the rooms. No monkeys.
“Did someone take the monkeys?” I asked Carl.
Carl hopped off the couch, walked into the kitchen, and pointed to the pet hatch in the back door.
I was stunned. I’d forgotten about the hatch.
“The monkeys escaped,” I said to Lula.
“How many monkeys we talking about?”
“Six.”
Somewhere not far off, a woman’s scream pierced the air.
“There’s one monkey,” Lula said.
I ran outside, and two doors down, a woman was standing in her backyard. I took a box of cookies from the grocery bag and went to investigate.
“Is something wrong?” I asked her.
“I opened the door to take the garbage out and a monkey ran into my house.”
“Don’t worry,” Lula said. “That monkey escaped from Monkey Control, and we’re here to catch the little bugger. Just step aside and we’ll take care of this.” Lula looked at me. “Go ahead. Go get the monkey.”
“You aren’t going to help?”
“Hell no. You know how I feel about monkeys.”
I went into the house and found the monkey drinking out of the toilet bowl.
I held a cookie out to him. “Yum,” I said.
The monkey’s eyes got bright, and he followed me out of the house. I gave him two cookies and locked him in the Jeep.