“We had pizza for lunch and we couldn’t finish it. You want some?”
“Sure.”
I passed the pizza box to her through the open window. “Any change in Norma’s routine? Has she had any visitors?”
“No. And no.”
“Are you here 24/7?” Lula asked. “Where do you go to the bathroom?”
“I go home when she goes to work. I figure Jerkface is sleeping then and isn’t going to be out walking around.”
“Jerkface as in Geoffrey?” I asked her.
“Yeah. Jerkface Geoffrey.” She opened the lid on the pizza box and looked inside. “What’s on this?”
“Everything,” I said.
Susan finished her cigarette, tore a chunk of pizza off for the cat, and ate the rest of the slice.
“I know he’s in there,” she said. “The shades are never raised. I can practically smell him from here.”
“That’s a long way to smell someone,” Lula said. “He must be a real stinker.”
“I’m tired of sitting here,” Susan said. “I’m going in tonight. Soon as she leaves, I’m breaking in.”
“Do you know how to do that?” Lula asked. “No offense but you’re sort of a amateur.”
“I watched a video on YouTube. It’s easy. It’s called lock bumping. I’m all set with a key from the hardware store that’s been filed down. And then all I have to do is hit it with a hammer.”
“God bless YouTube,” Lula said. “You don’t even need to go to college no more because you could learn how to do everything on YouTube.”
“She’s going to come out any minute,” Susan said. “You should go away or hide or something so you don’t spook her.”
Lula and I went back to the Mercedes and waited. After ten minutes Nurse Norma stepped out of her front door, locked it, got into her sporty car, and drove off. When she was out of sight Lula and I returned to Susan.
“Let’s do it,” Lula said to Susan. “Let’s root out Jerkface.”
Susan fished the bump key out of her purse. “Are you coming with me?”
“Hell yeah,” Lula said. “Wild horses couldn’t drag me away.”
Susan cracked a window for the cat, and we all marched across the parking area to Norma’s condo.
“I’ve never done this before,” Susan said, “but it didn’t look hard on the video.”
“I’ve done it lots of times,” Lula said. “I used to always break a window to get in, and sometimes when I’m not prepared ahead I still do that, but mostly I bump the lock now.”
Susan stuck the key into the lock, tapped it with the hammer, and turned. Nothing.
“You gotta have a knack,” Lula said. “Try again. You’ll get the feel of it.”
The lock tumbled on the third try.
“I did it!” Susan said.
“This could be the start of a whole new career for you,” Lula said. “Being able to bump a lock opens up lots of financial choices.”
“None of which are legal,” I said.