Freed: Fifty Shades Freed as told by Christian (Fifty Shades 6)

Ted.

My boy.

I’m besotted, with both of them.

She peeks up to check on me, and I’m caught mid-ogle. Her face erupts into an enormous smile. “Good morning, Mr. Grey. Enjoying the view?” She cocks an eyebrow, amused.

“Very much, Mrs. Grey.” Leaning up on my elbow, I press a tender kiss to her waiting lips, and another on the coppery down atop Ted’s head. Closing my eyes, I breathe in his scent; after Ana’s, it’s the sweetest fragrance in the world.

“He smells so good.”

“That’s because I changed his diaper ten minutes ago.”

I grimace, then smile.

Rather you than me!

Ana grins but rolls her eyes, knowing full well what I’m thinking. Teddy ignores us, his eyes closed, his hand splayed over the swell of Ana’s breast. He’s too busy enjoying breakfast.

Lucky boy.

He’s a very lucky boy. He sleeps with us.

That was a battle I was never going to win. And while it has somewhat curtailed our bedroom activity at night, it’s reassuring to know he’s so close when we sleep. It’s ironic to think that until I met Ana, I’d never slept with anyone, and now there are two people in my bed.

“Did he wake last night?”

“Not since I fed him at midnight.” She strokes his cheek once more and croons. “You slept all night, little man.” He pats her breast in response, staring up at her with eyes the same shade as hers, and with a look I know only too well.

Complete adoration.

Yep, Teddy and I suffer from the same fixation.

He closes his eyes and his suckling slows and stops.

She strokes his cheek, then delicately slides her finger into his mouth so he releases her nipple. “That’s breakfast done,” she whispers. “I’ll put him in his crib.”

“I’ll do it.” Today is a special day. Sitting up, I gently scoop him into my arms, enjoying his warmth and weight against my chest. I kiss his head once more and, holding him close, carry him next door to his room, where he should be sleeping. Miraculously, he stays asleep as I lay him down in his crib and cover him with his cotton blanket. Gazing down at him, I’m lost in an overwhelming swell of emotion. It hits me now and then—an immense tidal wave of love that washes over and through me. This tiny human has invaded my heart, ensnared it, and trashed all my defenses. Flynn was right: I love him unconditionally.

I shiver, because this feeling still frightens me, and scan his room. It’s painted like an apple orchard, and one day, I hope to teach him how to grow sweet red apples from a bitter green apple tree with the help of his namesake, Grandpa Theodore. Switching on the baby monitor, I grab the receiver and take it back to our bedroom.

Ana is fast asleep.

Damn. I never wished her a happy anniversary.

For a moment I contemplate waking her, but deep down I know that wouldn’t be fair. Ana is tired most of the time; sleep is prized over everything. Hopefully, now that Ted’s nearly three months old, she’ll get more rest.

I miss her.

Feeling a pang of regret that I know is completely selfish, I stride into the closet to change into my running gear.

I scroll through the songs on my phone and find one that Ana must have uploaded. It brings a smile to my lips.

With Rihanna’s “We Found Love” blaring through my earbuds, I set off for a run down Fourth Avenue. It’s early, and the streets are relatively empty, except for the occasional dog walker, and refrigerated trucks delivering to the local restaurants, and early-shift personnel heading to work. My mind empties as I concentrate on finding my rhythm and setting a long run pace. I’m heading northwest, the sun is shining, the trees are in full leaf, and I feel I could run forever. All is right in my world.

An idea occurs to me.

I decide on a nostalgia tour and set my sights on Ana’s old apartment, where Kate and Ethan live.

For old times’ sake.

Their living arrangements will change shortly; Kate and Elliot are getting married this coming weekend. As soon as Kate found out Ana was pregnant, and her due date, she changed all their plans so that Ana could still be her matron of honor. That woman is as determined as ever—I hope Elliot knows what he’s doing.

His bachelor party was epic, far more gregarious than mine. But that’s Elliot. And what happens in Cabo San Lucas stays there. And even though as best man it was my responsibility to organize the whole shebang, I spent those few days missing my wife and son. But then, I’m not the party animal—Elliot is—and he had fun. That was the point.

As I round the corner onto Vine Street, I’m reminded of my desperate runs during the dark days when Ana left me.