“Want something back from the deli?”
“Lemonade.”
“You’re welcome.” She nodded and slid a bag over her shoulder.
I waited until she was gone before sitting down and giving in to my emotions again.
I’d thought that I could break my record of six hours without thinking about Hayden, but it was no use. He invaded my daydreams, stormed through all of my thoughts, and I had to resist the frequent urge to pick up my phone and contact him.
He was, by far, the hardest breakup I’d ever had in my life, and I hated having to deal with it by myself.
Without my best friend.
“You know a ‘goodbye’ would’ve been nice.” Tatiana suddenly stepped in front of me. “Actually, I would’ve settled for an ‘I’ve changed my mind about flying to the compound to coach’ text message. That way, when I came back into town from my mini-coaching stint, I wouldn’t have been itching to file a Missing Persons report.”
Tears pricked my eyes as I looked up at her. “What are you doing here?”
“No, no, no,” she said. “The person who booked a flight without paying her part of the rent can’t ask me any questions right now. The better question is, why are you crying?”
I didn’t say anything.
“Frenemies talk to each other, Penelope,” she said. “They tell each other things.”
“Hayden broke up with me.”
Her eyes widened. “What?”
“He asked for space, and he also cheated on me.” Tears fell down my face.
She tilted her head to the side. “Where’d you get that latter thing from?”
“I lost my boyfriend and my best friend in one fell swoop.” I didn’t feel like addressing that topic right now. “I just reacted and picked up everything and left. I’m sorry that I didn’t call or text … I didn’t know what to say. Now I’m here and this doesn’t feel right. I mean, I want this more than anything, but the timing isn’t right, you know? And I feel like the one person I want to share it with isn’t here to celebrate the chance with me.”
She sat next to me on the bench, wrapping her arms around my shoulders.
I sobbed so hard that my chest and stomach ached even worse than they did last night.
“I have to vomit,” I said, rushing to the bathroom.
She followed and held my hair back just in time. “Hold on, let me get some tissue.”
“Ewww!” She scoffed. “There’s vomit in this other toilet already. Whatever food is being served here, don’t you dare offer it to me.”
“Sorry,” I said. “I forgot to flush that one an hour ago. That’s how upset I am. I’ve been crying every day.”
“Have you been vomiting like this every day, too?”
“Yeah.” I took the tissue from her. “I’ve never been like this after a break up before. This is so beyond awful that I don’t think I’ll ever get over him.”
“I bet.” She leaned against the wall. “I don’t think everything you’re feeling is due to the breakup, though.”
“What do you mean?”
“I think we need to get you a pregnancy test … ”
Forty-Three
Present Day
Penelope
Travis: Since you want to avoid my phone calls, I’m in town. Meet me for lunch. Now.
Me: Where? And what’s this about?
Travis: Anita’s at 43 Woodland.
Travis: You know what the fuck this is about.
I stepped into the café and took off my hat, stopping when I saw that all the shades in the room were drawn shut. The tables sat untouched and clear of silverware, and a brunette stood alone at the hostess stand.
“Good afternoon, Miss Carter,” she said. “Thank you for choosing Anita’s tonight. Can I show you to your reserved table?”
“Sure.” I followed her to a booth at the back of the room.
Over the years, I’d come to know this ‘reserved table’ routine very well.
Whenever Travis wanted to berate me for something, the idea of a public meeting was out of the question, so he made it look like he’d considered the idea.
This was how he’d always handled being a big brother, and I had no choice but to submit.
His way or no way.
I flipped through the pink plastic menu and ordered a stack of pancakes and a coffee. Then, just like clockwork, Travis walked through the door alone.
He handed the manager a clip of bills and made his way toward me.
“Hello, Crown.” He glared at me as he took off his jacket. “How are you on this lovely Saturday?”
“You’ve never been good at small talk, Travis. Please don’t try to practice now.”
“What can I get for you today, Mr. Carter?” The waitress moved in front of us, setting down two coffees.
“I’ll take what I discussed with your manager over the phone.” He kept his eyes on mine. “Nothing more, nothing less.”
“Yes, sir.” She stepped away.
“I really am interested in knowing how you’re feeling today,” Travis said. “Do you feel like hiding more things with Hayden or coming clean?”