Saber shook his head fiercely.
“You may not believe so, but I believe so and isn’t that what matters now? Whatever your past holds that you feel deems you unworthy has nothing to do with now. We start fresh like every new day.”
His eyes told her that he battled with her words, battled not to respond—and lost. “I wish.”
She placed one finger to his lips. “Your wish is granted, but you must let your voice rest, for my wish is for your throat to heal so that your voice is returned to you. Will you grant my wish, husband?”
How was it that this wee woman could tear at his heart, make him feel hopeful, and make him feel—loved? Could that be what was tearing at his heart—love? She might favor him enough to love him, but in the end love would not survive the hate she would have for him when she discovered the truth.
He nodded and cupped his hand over hers and rested her palm to his lips and kissed it gently. The smile that hurried to her lovely face and the slight shudder he felt trickle through her aroused him far too fast. He released her hand and stepped away, pointing to the various crocks as he had done before.
Perplexed, Elysia asked, “Still, you do not want us to have any bairns?” The unease that gripped her stomach settled when he shook his head. She warned him when he went to explain. “You will fail to grant my wish if you speak and worsen your throat.”
He frowned, then raised his hand and extended it as if in a slow wave, repeatedly doing so.
She scrunched her brow, trying to understand when suddenly it hit her. “Oh, you want to wait some to have bairns.”
He nodded vigorously and pointed to the crocks again.
“Aye, there is something my sister gave to women so they would not get with child. I can take it, but it will take—a day or so I believe—before it is useful.”
He nodded.
She turned her head to the hearth for a moment, before turning back to look at him to ask with some hesitation. “So you do favor me?”
He nodded without hesitation and stepped closer, his arm closing around her waist to slowly ease her against him. His hand went to the stray strand of hair that hung down near her left eye and he brushed it aside, tucking it gently behind her ear. His arm clamped snug around her waist and he lifted her with ease, as if she weighed a pittance, and brought her face to rest in front of his.
She saw his intention in his eyes and she didn’t wait. She wrapped her arms around his neck and brought her lips to his before he could capture hers.
He enjoyed even more this kiss they shared, not only because they shared it as husband and wife, but because he knew her lips had touched no other man’s lips but his. While he couldn’t say his lips had never touched another woman’s lips, he could say that none had touched his heart the way Elysia’s kiss did. The other kisses were empty, soulless kisses that meant nothing. When he and Elysia kissed, he felt it deep in his heart and down to his soul. Her kiss branded him forever.
He rested his brow to hers when the kiss ended.
“I love kissing you,” she whispered a bit breathless.
He nodded so that she knew he felt the same and his heart ached when he saw the disappointment in her eyes as he lowered her to her feet. It wasn’t what he wanted to do. He wanted to continue kissing her, but his hands itching to touch her and his rising manhood warned against it. He would take no chance of getting her with child. It would not be fair to her or the child. And he could not trust himself, once inside her, to withdraw before his seed spilled out. He would wait and keep her safe.
Saber pointed to her garments.
“I know that as your wife I am to go and live with you at your home, but I fear Annis will have no home to return to if I leave this cottage. Chieftain Emory will give it to someone else,” Elysia said, letting him know of her concern.
Saber shook his head, stood a moment looking around, then pointed to the crocks, the drying herbs gathered in bunches, the mortar and pestle on the small bench near the hearth, then pointed to the door and shook his head.
“Are you saying I am no longer the healer for the clan, that someone will replace me?” she asked, not that she would mind, since by no means did she think herself a capable healer. But Bliss might need her and how would she help her if she did not have use of her healing herbs and plants?