The CEO & I

I scowl at Matt.

Even though he’s hammered, he senses the shift in my mood. “Hey, I was only kidding, dude. I didn’t mean anything by it.”

“Whatever, man,” I say, pushing past him. I make my way back to the table. I’m done with him, and I’m done with this dinner. And I’m done with Jade. It’s not just about my own reputation, although that is a serious issue for me. It’s about hers too. Everyone will look at her the way Matt just did. They’ll think of her as slutty and cheap, when she is anything but those things. I like her too much to let people treat her that way. I can’t do this with her. I’ve been fooling myself. We’re away. In a hot country. We’re both attractive and we just lost our head. But the fun clearly has to end, for her sake and mine.

I walk up to the table. “We need to go.” I hate the cold sound of my voice, but it’s the only way I can get through this.

A flicker of surprise crosses her face. She doesn’t ask why. She simply sets her glass of wine down and stands up, so we can leave.

I don’t blame her for the confused expression on her face. I didn’t really explain to her what caused my sudden mood shift. I don’t want to explain it. And I don’t need to.

I’m coming off like an asshole, but my run in with Matt has me shaken up. He made it impossible for me to carry on pretending that what I’m doing is okay. Why the fuck did I have to run into him tonight? It ruined my good evening, and now, possibly even ruined things with Jade forever. I’ll never be able to look at this situation the same way again.

“Is something wrong?” she asks, as we walk out of the restaurant.

“No,” I say, trying not to snap at her. It isn’t her fault that I’m upset. I’m the bad guy here. I’m the fool who let things get this far. I have rules in place to avoid situations like this, but I stupidly broke those rules for Jade. My father must be laughing in his grave. Wait until you are in my shoes, then let’s see if you can walk away, he told me once when I begged him to come back to Mom. I spat in his face and told him I’d never be like him. Never.

Well, Dad…

She is my assistant. And I made a mistake. She’s beautiful and I got carried away. But I’m not going to carry on letting my dick decide my life. I’m not you. Not now. Not ever. I won’t let that happen. I’m better than you.

I know I’m hurting her, but in the long run, this will be for the best for her too. She deserves better. I’ll just end up breaking her heart and almost certainly hurting her career if I keep going with this. I could never live with myself if I did that.

I’m aware she wants to know what’s going on. Jade has a baffled expression on her face. I just can’t be with her. It’s not right for either of us. I just hope I can make her see that without tearing her heart to pieces like mine is right now.

Chapter 17

Jade

The limo pulls up to the curb five minutes after Luke calls the driver. Five minutes that seems like five hours of uncomfortable silence. I feel embarrassed by the way he rushed us out of there. Like I’m a child who threw a hissy fit in a grocery store and had to be yanked out by an adult.

The driver opens the door up for us. I get in first while Luke stands waiting for me. I’m surprised he does something so gentlemanly, considering his clearly agitated state. He gets in after me, and we pull away from the curb.

We sit in the limo, drowning in silence. There’s no laughing or playful banter. It’s completely different than the ride to the restaurant. It’s as if a different person is now in the limo with me. Someone cold and distant. Someone I really don’t know at all. Something is seriously wrong. He was fine until he went to the toilet. Did he get a phone call when he was in the bathroom? Was it business related? I want him to tell me what’s going on. He’s hiding something.

“What’s wrong?” I ask him. It’s the third time I’ve asked, but I can’t help it. I won’t just settle for ‘nothing’. It’s tearing me apart that he won’t just tell me what’s happening.

“Nothing,” he repeats. There’s a bitter tinge to his voice.

This is driving me crazy. Tonight, I felt myself get ready to take a ride on cloud nine. Now, I don’t know if things between us are heating up or cooling down. If this doesn’t work out, I’ll have to quit my job and move away. I’ll have to start all over.