My heart clenched. I didn't want to say the wrong thing, but I could understand why she didn't want Daphne to be her mother. She constantly used her and threw her away when it didn't serve her. It made me so angry. Annie was such a special child and to not be fully appreciated by her mother hurt.
"It’s okay, sweetie," I whispered quietly as I stroked her hair.
"Can't you stay with Daddy and me forever?"
My eyes watered and I knew I was close to bawling my eyes out, but I couldn't stop myself. I loved being around Annie. She was the light I needed to be happy, even if Daphne didn't see that. I didn't plan on going anywhere, but I knew that wasn't up to me, and I couldn’t feed her false hope. "What do you say we go get all cleaned up and then we watch something together, hmm?" I asked after I'd wiped my eyes quickly. "Does that sound good?"
Annie looked at me sadly but she didn’t push it. Just nodded.
I knew this was as good as it could be at the moment.
We ended up relaxing on the couch and even eating dinner there. She fell asleep on my lap as I stroked her hair and stared at the TV without really watching it.
"Hey."
I glanced up at Christian in the doorway. "Hey," I whispered. "She's out."
"I see. Sorry, I'm late I had a meeting run really long. Is everything okay?"
I shook my head a little. "Can we talk? After you put Annie to bed?"
Christian nodded and gently lifted her from my lap then took her upstairs.
I followed behind.
He settled her into the bed and tucked her in.
She mumbled in her sleep, clutched her pillow, then was completely out of it again.
We both slipped out of the room and Christian shut the door behind him. Then we walked into his room and only once that door was closed did I finally sag and allow how much the whole thing had bothered me to take over.
"What's wrong?" Christian asked as he gripped my shoulders and gave them a squeeze.
"We ran into Daphne at the mall. And by ran into I mean she lured Annie away just to see me lose my shit. And then when I caught up with them, she warned me to stay away from you or she's going to... I don't know come after me, or something," I cried, tears gathering in my eyes and rolling helplessly down my face.
“What?”
“I was so terrified. I thought she’d been taken by a pedophile. Oh, my God, Christian you don’t know how afraid I was! It was the most frightening feeling in the whole world. I would rather have Gabriel rape me than feel that again. I don’t know what she is going to tell you, but I swear I wasn’t careless with Annie. I love Annie with all my heart.” I couldn’t speak anymore and I began to sob like a baby.
"Fuck. She’s such a bitch," he spat.
“You believe me?”
He put his hands on either side of my cheeks. “Yes, I believe you.”
I felt a little better.
"You know I'm going to protect you no matter what, right?"
I nodded. "Yeah, I remember," I said as I reached up and covered his hands with my own.
"I'll have a chat with her, so don't worry anymore, okay? I know how to handle her."
I nodded. "Okay.”
“You feel better now?”
“Yes, but I’ve got something else to get off my chest.”
“Go on.”
I sniffed. “Annie said something kind of funny today and I didn't know how to respond."
"What did she say?"
"She wished I was her Mommy and she wanted me to stay here forever," I said, glancing up at him. "I didn't know what to say. I don't want her to hate her mom, so I didn't say anything negative, but I couldn't think of anything positive to say either. It just felt like bullshit on my tongue, and I couldn't lie to her. Why are you smiling?"
"You did well," he said. "You can't lie to a kid. They'll pick up on it in an instant."
I pursed my lips. "Well, I'm glad then that I did the right thing."
“You did well not to lie to her.”
I relaxed a little at his words. At least I knew I hadn't screwed her up for life in some way. As much as I knew how to be a nanny, I'd never been a parent. And I'd never had anyone tell me they wished I was their mother. It was surreal.
Christian stroked my cheek.
I then put my focus back on him. That weird smile hadn't left his lips and I stared up at him confused. What was going on inside his head? "What?" I finally asked.
"Would you like to be my girlfriend?"
Chapter Thirty
Hannah
I stared at Christian like he’d lost his mind.