God I Hate that Man

It’s a dangerous thought and I find myself tempted to run my hands over his body, to wake him up and ride him hard. But of course, I don’t. Instead, I turn around and practically run from the room before I do something else I’m going to regret.

I go through to my room and hop into the shower. I’m conscious of the tenderness between my legs, a physical reminder of how big and thick Finn is. I ignore the thoughts crowding my mind and focus on the day ahead of me. I have a couple of meetings today, meetings which could decide the fate of the charity, so I should be giving them my complete and undivided attention.

I get dressed, pulling on a black pantsuit with a pale blue blouse, then adding a pair of black flats. I know Finn wouldn’t approve of this outfit. What was it he said? Oh yes, I dress like I’m actually trying to repel people. Clearly, it didn’t work on him.

I grin at this thought, then I push Finn from my mind and go to stand in front of the mirror. Regardless of his opinion, I know this outfit is the right choice. It says professional, but it doesn’t say I spend thousands of dollars on clothes, because what sort of message does it send when the person running a charity could support half of her charges simply by selling some of her designer clothes?

I check the time and I’m shocked to see it’s barely five in the morning. I knew it was early, but this is really early. Finn is always in the office by seven. I debate sitting in the armchair in the corner of my room and reading my book for a bit. I smile to myself when I realize I had no trouble falling asleep without it last night.

I shake my head, trying to stop thoughts of Finn infiltrating my every other thought. I decide against sitting down with the book. I’m just going to go to the office early and prepare for my meetings. There’ll be other stuff I can do as well, there always is and at the office I’m not risking running into a naked, disheveled and sexy as fuck Finn.

This last thought does it and I flee. I hurry through the living room, barely glancing at Finn. As noiselessly as I can I grab my purse and the files I brought home last night. I am at the door of the apartment by the time I allow myself to glance back at Finn just one more time.

I smile to myself as I stand and watch him for a moment. He hasn’t moved since I left him and I still find myself wanting to go to him, to wake him with a kiss. I slip out of the apartment before I let myself do it.

It hits me as I run to the elevator so hard that I come to a dead stop. I don’t regret sleeping with Finn because I don’t like him. I regret it because I’m slowly starting to fall for him. I take a deep breath. This can lead to only one thing. Me getting hurt. I have to go back to avoiding him until I figure out some way to stop myself from falling more and more deeply in love with him. And I think, or at least I hope, it’s not too late for that.

14

Ashley

I’ve done a good job of avoiding Finn over the last couple of days. It’s day three since our episode on the couch, and I’ve managed to slip in and out for work, staying later at the office each night and going in earlier each day, without running into Finn. He works long hours himself and it’s been surprisingly easy to time it, so we don’t have to see each other. I’ve even caught up on a lot of those pesky admin tasks that need doing but aren’t a priority and tend to get ignored, so it’s been a win, win situation for me.

Tonight though, I’m so tired I decide to just come back home, and yes, I’m now starting to think of Finn’s place as home. It’s almost six and I know Finn isn’t due to come home for at least another four or five hours so I feel pretty safe when I decide to go to the kitchen and grab a soda. Finn wasn’t kidding about not keeping food in the apartment, but he has a surprisingly varied range of drinks and not just alcoholic ones.

I slip into my new pajamas, I bought a pair and returned Finn’s shirt, then head out to the kitchen. I’m humming to myself as I pull the fridge door open and look at the soda. I settle for a can of sparkling pineapple juice. I straighten up and close the fridge.