Marx Girl
Page 44
“Ben.” I frown.
“Don’t fight with me over this, Bridget. I mean it. He’s gone. For good.”
I sip my beer and he watches me as we have a silent stand-off.
Ben has two distinct sides. The beautiful sweet man who cares for me… and the dominant ass who has to have his own way. Unfortunately, that dominant ass happens to be so fucking sexy that I lose my mind over him.
He changes the subject. “Let’s go home and get you naked,” he whispers as his dark eyes drop to my lips. He trails his finger down my chest and over my breast.
I stand, annoyed, and then and I flick the towel to get the sand out. Sensing my annoyance, he stands behind me, wraps his arms around me, and sucks on the back of my neck.
“It’s time to repay the favour, angel. You belong to me now,” he whispers in my ear, causing goose bumps to scatter.
That statement is wrong on so many levels, but fuck… I’m totally screwed. He’s got me, and he knows it.
Belonging to Ben has always been my end game.
I wake to the gentle dusting of kisses on my shoulder, and I smile softly.
I know where I am and who I’m with without even opening my eyes. Ben gives the best wake up calls ever. It’s as if he can’t seem to grasp the reality that he’s here with me, so he has to touch every inch of my skin for confirmation. His hand roams from my jaw to my stomach, down to my behind, and then falls on my legs, up to my breasts and back to my hips. “Good morning.” I smile sleepily.
“Good morning,” he whispers as his lips take mine gently. His hand lingers on my jaw and we kiss for a moment. It’s soft and slow and I can already feel his erection against my leg.
“How did you sleep?” I ask.
“Like a log.” He rolls onto his back and pulls my body over his. I kiss his chest and run my hand over it as his lips rest on my temple. I have this nagging thought in the back of my mind and it won’t go away. I thought about it all night and this wasn’t how it was supposed to go. In my mind, I would get the answers I needed first and then we would get to know each other all over and resolve any issues before I gave him a green light to my body.
But somehow Ben has a way with me, and no matter how hard I try I can’t stay away.
I frown as I try get my wording right. “Ben?”
“Hmm.” He smiles as he kisses my forehead.
“There was something you said to me all those years ago, and I haven’t been able to get it out of my head.”
I feel his body stiffen beneath me and he stays silent.
“You said that you had a past you didn’t want catching up with me.” I look up at him. “What exactly did you mean by that?”
A frown crosses his face. “I don’t know what I meant by it, it was just something I said. Maybe I meant the army?”
I sit up, confused. “You don’t remember saying that?”
He pulls me back into his arms. “Stay close,” he replies as he holds me tight and kisses my forehead again.
“You really don’t remember what you said the night you left me?” Oh, deflation fills me. How could this be? I have gone over that conversation in my head every day for five years.
He shrugs.
I watch him. “It’s a yes or no question, Ben.”
“Then it’s a no.”
I lie still in his arms as his lips roam over my forehead.
I still feel like I need answers, and if I don’t get them now maybe I never will. I don’t want there to be any secrets between us. I can’t live my life with a man who won’t talk openly. I’m just going to come out with it.
“Why did you leave me back then, Ben?”
“Don’t.”
I frown and sit up again. “Don’t what?”
“Don’t drag up the past.”
I watch him for a moment as my brain tries to catch up. “But I feel unsettled. I have unresolved issues that still go through my mind. I need to quiet them, and if we are to move forward I need to know that you leaving is not going to happen again.”
“It’s not. I told you it’s not. I wouldn’t have come back otherwise.”
“Okay, so we talk about what happened, why you said there were things I didn’t know about you, and we resolve it,” I reply.
“Fucking leave it, Bridget,” he snaps as he gets out of bed.
What the hell?
“No, I won’t. I want to know.” I’m getting pissed off now. “What did you think could hurt me if I stayed with you back then?”