He said his father was Jamaican and his mother Irish. They’d been good parents. Until they weren’t.
I grunted a non-answer and pushed off from the door where I’d been swaying with the sudden urge to vomit. Climbing the stairs had pushed me to my limit.
I swallowed bile, ignored my wounds, and shuffled to my assigned dormitory bed. I didn’t bother stripping or washing or even pissing in the bucket. My body was done. I had nothing left. I fell face-first onto the uncomfortable mattress and groaned in pain.
Feet whispered their way toward me. The presence of a boy trapped in hell just like me hovered by my arm. His closeness set off the chain reaction inside me. I couldn’t have someone close to me right now. Not after what they’d done tonight.
But Zanik was like me.
He cared even while they broke him. He wouldn’t let me suffer alone even though that was all I wanted.
When his hand stroked my back, the pain of his kindness almost tore me in two.
A heavy sob clawed up my throat, but I choked it back down.
No one cried here anymore.
No one.
“You’re okay, Kas. We’ll protect you for the rest of the night. Won’t we, guys?”
My ears pricked as the other unfortunates in this prison all spoke as one. A mumble of misery with our messed-up brotherhood sisterhood.
“We’ll watch over you, Kassen.”
Female blended with male.
There were no separate bedrooms for different sexes. No screens for privacy when we changed or had to go to the bathroom. We were as intimately linked as any person—family or friends could be.
Forcing strength I didn’t have into my body, I sat up. I flopped onto my ass and gritted my teeth against the pain resonating from my asshole to the base of my skull.
They’d been extra ‘attentive’ tonight. Rough and ruthless. Not sparing me an inch.
A girl with blond hair, a gap in her teeth, and pretty hazel eyes slid off her squeaky bed and came to me. We stared at each other for a moment. Her pity for me was obvious. My pity for her was equally visible. We all stank of pity for one another.
Wordlessly, she opened her arms and crawled into bed with me.
I flinched against her contact.
I didn’t want to be touched and had long lost the privilege of touching another, but she didn’t give me space to become rotten with what they’d done. They could take away so much from us, but here, in this tiny dormitory, we all did our best to patch each other up, glue up our holes, sticky-tape our breaks, and not shatter completely.
Her small body fitted against me, and Zanik joined our awkward hug. He sat on my other side, wrapping his arms around me and Quell.
And we just sat there.
We sat there for so long, exhaustion found me, and I started to slip into sleep.
I was only vaguely aware as more of my family joined us on my bed.
Nyx and Jareth, Maliki and Sarez.
My heart tried to heal but, instead, tore itself to pieces, knowing that our fractured unit wasn’t complete. Elise, Neo, and Wes were still serving.
I’d been the first to finish. I wished I’d been the last so the others could be here. Safe in the arms of each other. Protected from more pain.
Tomorrow, I would try all over again to figure out how to save them. I would do my chores and get on my knees, all while seeking out the weaknesses of this place.
But until then, I would sleep. I would heal. I would grow stronger and smarter so I could keep the promise we’d all made.
The promise that had been bound in blood almost two years ago.
It’d been Nyx’s idea.
The shy little redhead who was the youngest of us all. She’d tried to climb out the window. She’d been caught. Whipped. Brought back bleeding. But instead of crying like so many of us did in our first year here, she’d merely smeared the blood over her fingers and approached us one by one.
“We’ll survive another day.”
I’d been the third one she’d marked, but I’d been the first to grab the large splinter from the decaying window frame and prick my finger. I’d run crimson over her in return, repeating what she’d said. “We’ll survive another day.”
The rest of them followed until we all had dried blood and healing puncture wounds scarring us with our oath.
We’ll survive another day.
And we had.
Another and another and another.
Until finally, there was no more to endure.
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
DAWN CAME AND WENT, according to the slivers of light through the crumbling mortar. Stomach rumbles demanded food, then gave up and went silent. The urge to pee grew from annoying to unavoidable. The shame of using a bucket once again shoved me closer to my limit.
How could he throw me back down here?