Train Me Daddy

My voice echoed off walls and buildings. The crowds of well-dressed people around me eyed me with pity, like they felt sorry for me.

“Stop staring, assholes,” I muttered under my breath. “You want to keep looking at Thomas March, you’d better take a fucking picture.”

I couldn’t believe it. I’d been chasing after June for blocks, and I still hadn’t managed to catch her. I had no idea how she was managing to run so quickly – especially in heels. When we’d gone out before, she’d barely been able to walk.

But somehow, I was starting to guess that my June was a fast learner.

Finally, in complete frustration, I turned around and went running back to Aguilar, the Spanish restaurant where we’d started a disastrous evening. I knew that it had been wrong to shut June out, but I couldn’t have possibly told her the truth without ruining her evening, too.

Now I felt like a fool. I should’ve been honest with her from the beginning, and told her what was bothering me. Now, I worried that I’d ruined a lot more than dinner. I’d acted like a complete fool – how the hell was I supposed to apologize for that? I just needed to find June and talk to her in person…I was sure she’d listen to what I had to say.

On my way down the block, I pulled out my phone and dialed June. Predictably, it went straight to voicemail.

“June, this is me – Thomas. I am so, so sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you, and I swear that I’m not angry with you at all. Something really bad—“

Beep! Beep! Beep!

Looking down in frustration, I groaned when I saw that Marlene was calling. I hit ‘ignore’ but by the time I got back to June’s voicemail, the inbox was full and I couldn’t leave another message.

“God damn it!” I screamed. For a moment, I was tempted to smash my phone on the sidewalk. But then I realized that if June got my message, she wouldn’t be able to call me back. Breaking into a run, I darted across the street and into Aguilar.

“Yes?” the maître d looked up at me. “Forget something?”

“Did she come back?” I asked breathlessly.

“Who, sir?” He narrowed his eyes. “Who are you talking about?”

“The girl with black hair, the one I was sitting with,” I said quickly.

“No, sir, I have not seen her.”

“Fuck!” I balled my hand into a fist and slammed it down on the table. The maître d looked perturbed.

“Sir, if I may help you, please let me know. Otherwise, I am very sorry, but I will have to ask you to leave.”

“Whatever,” I mumbled. “Thanks for nothing.”

Outside, I climbed in a cab and gave the driver June’s Brooklyn address. I figured that she must have gone home – aside from Angela, I didn’t think she had any friends. The cab ride felt long – too long – and I was sweating bullets the whole time. Why had I been such an asshole? June was the woman in my life, the woman I was falling in love with! And I’d treated her like nothing, like garbage, just because I’d gotten some very bad news.

When the cab pulled up in front of June’s building, I paid the driver and then leapt out. Bolting up the stairs, I pounded on the door.

Angela opened it, looking surprised.

“Is June here?” I barged in, pushing her to the side. “June,” I yelled loudly. “June, it’s me! We need to talk! June!”

“She’s not here,” Angela said suspiciously. She crossed her arms over her chest and eyed me. “What’s going on?”

“I fucked up.” I started pacing back and forth in June’s living room, tangling my hands in my hair and pulling until my scalp ached. “I fucked up so badly, I scared her off. I really hurt her, Angela!”

Angela gave me a sour look. “Well, she’s not here,” she said firmly. “And I’m not lying – although if June had asked me to lie to you for her, I would.”

“You’re a big help,” I said sarcastically. “Thanks for nothing.”

“No, wait,” Angela said. “What happened?”

I told her the whole story, groaning at my juvenile, shitty behavior. When I was finished, Angela looked sick.

“You treated her like shit and now you’re surprised that she ran out on you?” Angela clicked her tongue against her teeth. “Look, I don’t even think you deserve another chance.”