k at the nurses’ station for you to fill out,” she said. “We’ll need just a few minutes for the spinal tap and then you can come back and be with Maggie.”
Hadley tensed, intending to resist being evicted for the procedure, but then she remembered that she was the nanny, nothing more. She’d given up her rights when she’d given Liam back his ring.
When they stepped into the hallway, Hadley turned to Liam. “I should go.”
“Go?” he echoed, his expression blank, eyes unfocused. “Go where?”
“I don’t really belong here.” As much as that was true in a practical sense, she couldn’t shake a feeling of responsibility to Maggie and to him.
Foolishness. If anyone besides Liam had hired her, she wouldn’t have let herself get personally involved. She’d never slept with any of her other clients, either. Even with Noah she hadn’t stepped across that line. They’d been close, but something about sleeping with him with his children down the hall hadn’t sat well with her. And right before the weekend they were supposed to go away and be together for the first time was when Noah decided to go back to his ex-wife.
“Maggie needs you,” Liam countered. “You can’t leave her now.”
“I’m her nanny.” It hurt to admit it, but Hadley knew that after what had happened between her and Liam, she needed to start pulling back. “What she needs is her family. Why don’t you call her grandmother?”
“You mean the woman who left her with me and hasn’t demonstrated any grandmotherly concern since?”
Hadley was torn. Her presence wasn’t needed while Maggie was at the hospital. The nurses would see to it that the baby was well tended. Liam could give her all the love and snuggling she required.
“I’m sorry that Maggie’s mother died and her grandmother is so far away, but I can’t be here for you and for her in this way. She’s in good hands with the nurses and with you. I’ve already gotten too involved. I can’t keep pretending like nothing has changed.” Hadley turned in the direction of the elevator so Liam wouldn’t see her tears.
He caught her arm before she could take a step. “I’m sorry, too,” he murmured in her ear, his breath warm against her temple. “I never meant for any of this to hurt you.”
And then he set her free. Gutted and empty, she walked away without glancing back.
* * *
Liam sat on the couch in Maggie’s hospital room. A nurse had appeared half an hour ago to take Maggie’s temperature and change her diaper. When she’d completed her tasks, she’d dimmed the lights and left Liam in semidarkness. It was a little past six. He’d skipped both lunch and dinner but couldn’t bring himself to leave the room. He felt empty, but it wasn’t because he was hungry. The hollowness was centralized in his chest. Loneliness engulfed him unlike anything he’d known before.
He hadn’t felt this lost when Kyle left for the navy or when his grandfather had died. The ranch had provided abundant distractions to occupy him, and he’d thrown himself into building the business. That wasn’t going to work this time.
He rarely felt sorry for himself, but in the eight hours since Hadley had taken off, he’d begun to realize the wrong turn his life had taken. The arrival of Maggie and Hadley had been the best thing that had ever happened to him. Acting as Maggie’s caretaker had taught him the true meaning of the word responsibility. Up until now, he’d had people who did things for him. Staff, his grandfather, even the women he dated. While he didn’t think of himself as selfish, he’d never had to put anyone’s needs above his own.
But even as he’d patted himself on the back for championing Maggie’s welfare, hadn’t he ignored his brother’s needs when he’d decided to seek custody of his niece? And Hadley’s? How had he believed that being married to him was any sort of reward for her love and the sacrifice to her career that staying in Royal would require?
He’d played it safe, offered her an expensive ring and explained that he needed her and wanted her in his life. But he’d never once told her he was madly, passionately in love with her and that if she didn’t marry him, he’d be heartbroken. Of course she’d felt underappreciated.
Liam thought about the nightmare he’d had after returning from Colorado. Sleeping alone for the first time in three nights had dragged powerful emotions from his subconscious. He could still recall the sharp pain in his chest left over by the dream, a child’s hysterical panic as he’d chased his mother out of the house, pleading with her not to go.
By the time he’d awakened the next morning, there’d been nothing left of the disturbing dream but a lingering sense of uneasiness. He’d shoved the genie back into the bottle. Craving love only to have it denied him was not something he ever wanted to experience again. And so he’d only shown Hadley physical desire and made a superficial commitment without risking his heart.
She’d been right to leave him. He’d pushed her to ride again, knowing how devastated she’d been by her friend’s accident. He’d badgered her to forgive herself for mistakes she’d made in the past without truly understanding how difficult that was for her. But worst of all, he’d taken her love and given nothing back.
Liam reached into his pocket and drew out the engagement ring. The diamonds winked in the dim artificial light. How many of his former girlfriends would have given it back? Probably none. But they would’ve been more interested in the expensive jewelry than the man who gifted it. Which explained why he’d chosen them in the first place. With women who wanted nothing more from him than pretty things and a good time, he never had to give of himself.
What an idiot he’d been. He’d stopped dating so his head would be clear when the right girl came along. And when she had, he’d thought to impress her with a trip to Vail and a big engagement ring. But Hadley was smart as well as stubborn. She was going to hold out for what really mattered: a man who loved her with all his heart and convinced her with words as well as deeds just how important she was to him.
Up until now, he hadn’t been that man. And he’d lost her. But while she remained in Royal, he had a chance to show her how he truly felt. And that’s exactly what he was going to do.
Thirteen
After abandoning Liam and Maggie at the hospital, Hadley took a cab home and spent the rest of the day on the couch watching a reality TV marathon. The ridiculous drama of overindulged, pampered women was a poor distraction from the guilt clawing at her for leaving Liam alone to cope with Maggie. Worry ate at her and she chided herself for not staying, but offering Liam comfort was a slippery slope. Already her emotions were far too invested.
At seven she sent Kori a text about getting a ride to Wade Ranch in the morning to pick up her car. She probably should have gone tonight, but felt too lethargic and even had a hard time getting off the couch to answer the door for the pizza delivery guy.
It took her friend an hour to respond to the text. Hadley forgot she hadn’t told Kori yet about her broken engagement. Leave it to her to have the world’s shortest engagement. It hadn’t even lasted three days. With a resigned sigh, Hadley dialed Kori’s number.
“So, what’s going on that you left your car at Liam’s?”