When I didn’t respond to the claim, Mom continued to talk. “She thinks the world of you.”
“She does?” I whispered, knowing I shouldn’t care.
“Yes. Couldn’t run out of good things to say about you.”
That shouldn’t make me feel good. It should make me feel like shit, considering the offer I originally made with her.
“I can tell she adores you…respects you…even loves you.”
Maybe some of that was true, but not all of it. “Her feelings for me aren’t that deep.”
“I don’t agree.”
“She talks about me finding someone else all the time. She knows what we have isn’t forever. It’s just…what it is.”
Mom studied my face, reading my emotions like a book. “And that bothers you.”
“I never said it did.”
“But it does.”
I angled my face away from hers, trying to make it difficult for her to read me.
“Carter, don’t forget who you are. You’re the kind of man that speaks his mind and isn’t afraid to say what he wants. If you want this woman, tell her that. If you want this woman to love you, make her.”
“Make her, huh?” I whispered.
“For someone like you, it must be easy.”
I wasn’t sure if I wanted Mia to love me at all. “She has a son… I’m not sure how I’ll feel about that.”
“Why would that change anything?”
“I’ve never had a girlfriend before. Jumping into a relationship this complicated sounds like a bad idea. The only kid I’ve ever been around is Reid, and since he’s only a few weeks old, that doesn’t count. I’m not ready to be a father, let alone a stepfather.”
“But you’re going to live with both of them?”
“It doesn’t change anything. He’s her responsibility—not mine.”
Mom pulled her hand away. “It sounds to me like you don’t want commitment, but you want everything else.”
“Maybe.”
“I think it’s inevitable, Carter. Just accept it—it’s not so bad.”
I pulled my hand off the table and considered what she said. “After what Mia has been through, I don’t think she’s looking for love. She said she wants to raise her son and focus on him. She doesn’t trust men.”
“Except you. Like I said, she couldn’t say enough good things about you.”
“I’m not good enough for her…” She was in my captivity for a month, and I never tried to save her. The only reason I did was because I got attached to her, enjoyed sleeping with her. She was the one in a bad situation who never gave up. She was a much stronger person than I would ever be.
“You saved her, Carter. You reunited her with her son. Sounds like you’re the only man who’s worthy of her.”
“No offense, Mama, but you’re blinded by love.”
“No.” She rested her hand on my arm. “I know you better than you think I do. I know that Mia would still be a prisoner if it weren’t for you, that she would have died without seeing her son ever again. You’re her savior, the only man brave enough to do the right thing. Any other man she meets will never compare to you. Maybe you don’t see it right now…but you’re the only man she’s ever going to want.”
After my mother left, I went to the second floor where Mia’s bedroom was. Since she was nowhere to be found, I assumed she was purposely avoiding me, knowing I would be angry that she told my mother the truth about our situation.
I tapped my knuckles against the door, giving her the option to deny me if she wished. It was the kind of freedom she didn’t have before, and since it meant so much to her, I never infringed on it—even though this was my house.
“Come in.”
I stepped inside, seeing her on the couch in her private living room. She was in the same dress she wore earlier, her feet pulled up to her knees. She stared at me with trepidation, like she didn’t know what might happen now that we were face-to-face.
I slowly approached her, seeing the fear on her face. I stopped and stared at her, saying nothing.
She didn’t say anything either.
I kept looking at her until she lowered her gaze.
“I’m sorry I told your mother. But she saw the scars on my back and pretty much pulled everything out of me.”
“I’m not angry.”
She lifted her gaze again. “Then why do you look so angry?”
“She told me what happened to her…” My mother assured me she was fine, that it was so long ago that it didn’t matter anymore. She made her peace with the past and moved on, finding happiness with my father and the family they made together. If my father hadn’t saved her, I never would have been born.
“Are you okay?”
“Not sure yet.” I lowered myself onto the cushion beside her, my eyes still slightly puffy from the tears I’d shed earlier. “My chest still hurts, and I can’t remember the last time I shed tears. But when she told me, I couldn’t help it. My mother didn’t deserve that.”