The Gathering Storm

The women fell silent. None of them wanted to admit outright that the plan had backfired. Adelorna settled back in her chair, arms folded, smoldering but no longer flinging out accusations.

"It was Elaida," Ferane said. "She wasn't ever . . . very logical."

"She was a bloody disaster is what she was," Adelorna muttered.

"It was more than that," Jesse admitted. "Directly choosing Sitters we could control to replace those sent to the rebels was a good decision, but perhaps too obvious. The women of our own Ajahs became suspicious; I know of several comments made by women of the Brown. We are not so oblivious as others would like to think us."

Serancha nodded. "It smelled of conspiracy," she said. "That made the women less trusting. And then there were the rebels. Far more difficult to control than presumed."

The women nodded. They, like Jesse, had assumed that with proper direction, the rebels would find their way back to the Tower and ask forgiveness. This division should have ended with no more damage than a few bruised egos.

But they hadn't counted on how resilient, or effective, the rebels would be. A full army, appearing on the shores around Tar Valon in the middle of a snowstorm? Led by one of the greatest military minds of the Age? With a new Amyrlin and a frustratingly effective siege? Who could have expected it? And some of the Sitters they had sent had begun siding with the rebels more than the White Tower!

We never should have let Elaida disband the Blue Ajah, Jesse thought. The Blues might have been willing to come back, had it not happened. But it was such a dishonor that they dug in. Light only knew how dangerous that was; the histories were filled with accounts of how dogged the Blues could be at getting their way, particularly when they were forced into a corner.

"I think it is time to admit that there is no hope to save our plans," Suana said. "Are we agreed?"

"Agreed," Adelorna said.

One by one, the sisters nodded their heads, and so did Jesse herself. Even in this room, it was difficult to admit fault. But it was time to cut their losses and begin rebuilding.

"This has its own problems," Serancha said, voice more calm now. The other women looked more assured as well. They didn't trust one another, these five, but they were far closer to doing so than any other group with any authority in the Hall.

;I think so," he said, turning to glance toward the center of camp. She could just barely make out the large gathering tent of the Hall through the scrub trees.

"Then I must appear before them," Egwene said, taking a deep breath. She began to walk forward.

"No," Gawyn said, stepping in front of her. "Egwene, we need to talk."

"Later."

"No, not later, burn it! I've waited months. I need to know how we stand. I need to know if you—"

"Stop!" she said.

He froze. She would not be taken in by those eyes, burn him! Not right now. "I said that I hadn't sorted through my feelings yet," she said coolly, "and I meant it."

He set his jaw. "I don't believe that Aes Sedai calmness, Egwene," he said. "Not when your eyes are so much more truthful. I've sacrificed—"

"You've sacrificed?" Egwene interrupted, letting a little anger show. "What about what I sacrificed to rebuild the White Tower? Sacrifices that you undermined by acting against my express wishes? Did Siuan not tell you that I had forbidden a rescue?"

"She did," he said stiffly. "But we were worried about you!"

"Well, that worry was the sacrifice I demanded, Gawyn," she said, exasperated. "Don't you see what a distrust you have shown me? How can I trust you if you will disobey me in order to feel more comfortable?"

Gawyn didn't look ashamed; he just looked perturbed. That was actually a good sign—as Amyrlin, she needed a man who would speak his mind. In private. But in public she'd need someone who supported her. Couldn't he see that?

"You love me, Egwene," he said stubbornly. "I can see it."

"Egwene the woman loves you," she said. "But Egwene the Amyrlin is furious with you. Gawyn, if you'd be with me, you have to be with both the woman and the Amyrlin. I would expect you—a man who was trained to be First Prince of the Sword—to understand that distinction."

Gawyn looked away.

"You don't believe it, do you?" she asked.

"What?"

"That I'm Amyrlin," she said. "You don't accept my title."