I slowly walked towards the front. When Ranier saw me, he stood up and gave me a slow hug, bringing me close to him. I hadn’t expected such a warm greeting (well, at least it was warm for him). His face was stone cold expressionless, as I remembered. Ranier was one of those guys who wore a permanent poker face. I’d rarely seen him smile, show sadness, fear, or anger. He was always stone faced. I wished I could be that way sometimes. I’d tried to adopt that kind of expression when doing business, but eventually my natural friendliness won out. It was just who I am.
“Thanks for coming,” Ranier said quietly. “I wasn’t sure you would.”
“Well, after your kind voicemail, it was the least I could do.”
Ranier glared at me. “Don’t push it.”
“What?” I asked. It was his natural tendency to try to dominate everything and make people fear him. He wasn’t happy unless everyone around him was walking on eggshells. I suspected it was due to his being so short. Ranier was barely five feet seven, and that was only because he usually wore large boots with two inch heels. When we were younger he would fight anyone, no matter how large, at the drop of a hat. He would usually lose, but when he started getting followers then he was able to even the scores a bit.
And he’d always been angry at the fact that his father treated me as much like a son as he did Ranier.
“You left the family,” Ranier said. “My father just let you go. If anyone else had ever tried to just leave that way, things would have been much messier.”
I smiled. “Well, that was Arnold’s decision. He is your father and he was the captain in the family. Maybe you should finally just accept his decision.”
“Things have changed,” Ranier said. “I’m the captain now. My father has gradually over the years stepped back a bit and let me handle things.”
“Well, that has nothing to do with me. I came because I loved your father. He was always there for me. I didn’t come because of your petty threats.”
Ranier sneered and sat back down. I looked over at the other guys who were watching the conversation unfold. They seemed amused that I hadn’t backed down from Ranier. Backing down from anyone for any reason has never really been my style.
I’m too much of a free spirit. Any time someone tries to trample that freedom, it riles up an anger in me that won’t quit. I have to stand my ground and keep my respect. No one gets a pass on this.
The service began a few minutes later. The church was packed with people. Most of them were from the business side of the family and many were just from the bloodlines of the family. They were a tight knit, loving unit. Most of them were crying and doing their level best to keep it together. I felt for them.
Ranier never shed one tear though. He wouldn’t, I knew. But I could tell he was dying on the inside. He and his father had been very close. He was the spitting image of the man in form and in spirit. But somewhere along the way Ranier had become so cold, so resistant to almost everything. It was like he suddenly saw the whole world as a threat. I wasn’t sure where this bitterness came from and I don’t think Arnold knew either.
And now that Arnold was gone, who was going to keep Ranier’s rage in check? That was a legitimate concern. A loose cannon like that could not be allowed to roam free unhinged.
I hoped I was wrong and Ranier would eventually get his mind together. But who knew how long that might take, or if he’d live long enough to see it?
The priest went through the service slowly, at times speaking in Latin. I doubted anyone there understood a bit of the dead language, but the sentiment was still obviously felt. By the time the service was over, I was having trouble keeping my eyes dry.
My heart was broken. I felt as if I had now buried two parents. I never really knew my real father, and Arnold was the closest thing I’d had to one. And now he was gone. My mother was gone. My father was gone. My grandfather was gone. And Arnold was gone.
When I thought about all of this that way, I just wanted to break down. I felt alone, weakened, defeated somehow. I’d become a tycoon in business and I had a lot of power and control in my life, but still the realization that I was basically an orphan now was the most sobering, heartbreaking thought I ‘d ever experienced.
As I staggered out of the church and took in several long breaths of fresh air, my legs were wobbling. I was keeping the emotions inside of me, but my body was physically starting to break down. I just wanted to lie down or curl up in a ball and cry my eyes out.