Danny was stoked. Before me, he did this a lot. I already worried he was giving up too much to be with me. I didn’t have my shit together. I was still fighting battles I should have put to rest years ago, or at least the year before, when I’d finally come out. I didn’t want him to give this up too.
And I want to go. I want this. I want a life.
I didn’t want to be fucked up about everything. I wanted to dance with my boyfriend and see other men dancing before we went home and had sex all night. I wanted to wake up with him and take him home to meet my family without feeling like I was going to lose my shit over it.
“What are you doing?” Danny came out of the bathroom, wearing a pair of underwear. We’d just gotten out of the shower, and he’d finished brushing his teeth, which I still needed to do.
“I don’t know what to wear,” I admitted, looking in his closet because…well, at some point, my clothes had made it there too.
“No matter what you choose, we’re gonna have to fight off the guys all night. I’ll have to be all growly and possessive.” He actually made the sound, then said, “Mine, mine, mine.”
I laughed. “I expect you to do that all night. Protect my virtue.”
He stepped closer to me, nuzzled his face into my neck. “Mine, mine, mine,” he said again. “I’ll make sure everyone knows it too. Wear those black jeans. They do great things for your ass, and…hmm…your forest-green T-shirt. I love the way it hugs your muscles. Gets me hard every time.” Then he smacked my ass and walked away.
Fuck, I loved it. Loved the way he treated me. Loved feeling like I belonged to him.
I loved Danny.
I finished getting ready while he went through his clothes forever, trying on a million outfits. “Do you do this every time you go out?”
“Duh.” He winked. He had on a pair of white underwear, and tugged on a leather jacket with no shirt. Not gonna lie, my dick perked up. “Oh, you like this. You want me to put it on sometime before we fuck? I can’t wait until it cools off so I can wear it.” I was sitting on the bed, and Danny came over, jacket still on, and straddled my lap. “Do I look hot?”
“So fucking hot.”
He cupped my erection, gave me a loud smacking kiss, then got off me.
“Hey! I wasn’t done with you.”
“It’s a prelude for later. I didn’t know you got off on watching me have a fashion show,” he teased, tugging off the jacket.
Danny settled on black jeans and a white cut-off tank top.
We didn’t leave our apartment until about ten. The bar was in walking distance, as so many things in Midtown were, but we were heading to Shaw and Elijah’s first, to meet up with everyone.
The second we hit the sidewalk, Danny laced our fingers together. Some of the nerves inside me settled instantly, and that just felt…good. Nothing about it made me feel weak the way I would have only weeks before.
Elijah, Shaw, Will, Jameson, Ali, Kira, and Brooklyn were all in the lobby of Elijah’s building when we arrived. There was a girl there I hadn’t met before, holding Brooklyn’s hand.
“Look who finally decided to show up,” Will teased.
Danny said, “My boyfriend wouldn’t stop trying on all the outfits. I was ready an hour ago, but Jonathan wanted to have a fashion show for me.”
I rolled my eyes playfully. “Yeah, it was me who couldn’t decide what to wear. I put on the first thing he said I should.” My face warmed as I realized I’d told them Danny basically made the decision about what I would put on tonight.
No one batted an eye, though, and Jameson said, “It was a good choice.”
“Right?” Danny replied.
“You’re embarrassing him. Let’s go.” Kira smiled at me.
Everyone was loud, chatting and laughing as we walked to the bar. I stayed quiet, just taking it all in. I wasn’t real good at the jokes and being the center of attention. I preferred to let it unfold around me.
There was a line outside when we arrived, but it didn’t take long to get in. As we stepped inside, loud music vibrating my chest, Danny squeezed my hand in support, but as he did it, and as much as I appreciated it, I realized I didn’t need it.
This was me. People here would be accepting. I had a whole group of friends around me and the man I loved by my side.
For the first time since the treehouse, my dad’s voice was completely silent inside my head.
“I want to dance,” I said.
Danny turned, looked at me, and smiled. “Yeah?”
“I do.”
The words had hardly left my mouth before he was tugging me to the dance floor. I looked at our friends behind us. Will was watching me and smiling. I mouthed, “Thank you,” but wasn’t sure if he understood what I said.