“I didn’t either,” I replied. Maybe he was right. They weren’t perfect, but I wasn’t either. I still hadn’t been secure in who I was, so I pulled away from them, putting all the blame on them when it was a two-way street.
“We need to be better from now on,” Brad said. “All of us, which means we’re gonna be dragging you with us when we go out as brothers, Will.”
“And your boyfriend too—Jameson,” Nolan added.
“We’d like that,” Will answered.
I stood tall and said, “I met someone too…Danny…the guy I live with. He’s not my roommate. He’s my boyfriend, and I’m…I’m in love with him. I haven’t been fair to him, or to you guys by not sharing him with you. I want that to change. I need it to change.”
Mom’s arms went around me first. Then Will’s, followed by Nolan and Brad. We hugged, cried, trying to cleanse ourselves of the past.
When we pulled apart, Nolan said, “I can’t wait to meet him, man. And we might not always be perfect, but—”
“We love you,” Brad said. “Both of you.”
The conversation didn’t stop there. There was so much to say, too many words we’d all kept to ourselves our whole lives. We talked about Will’s job and Jameson. About my brothers and their significant others, and Brad said they were going to try and have another baby. I told them more about Danny, about his family and baseball and how I wanted to go to art school.
I even told them about the friends who’d stopped talking to me when I came out. It was important for them to know the reality for queer people, what I’d been going through. And that I had it better than some people.
Mom had a lot to deal with personally too, especially when it came to Dad. She felt she’d let us down, and that there were things about him she didn’t know.
We spent the day together, learning about each other and trying to become a family.
It was evening when I finally said, “I need to get home…to Danny.”
“I can’t believe you found someone who will put up with you,” Nolan teased.
“For real,” Brad concurred, and it was…perfect. It was normal.
Mom cupped my cheek and smiled. “I can’t wait to meet him.”
And she would. Soon.
When I got to the car, there was one phone call I still needed to make. That done, I headed back for Atlanta. To my man.
CHAPTER THIRTY
Danny
“You okay?” Elijah asked me. We were sitting on my couch. I had my head in his lap as he played with my hair.
I’d called him over a few hours ago. I spent most of the day by myself, but the longer Jonathan was gone, the more nervous I became. I’d never been like this before, so afraid of losing someone, so afraid something would go wrong. “Yeah, I just…”
“You love him,” Elijah said.
“I do.”
“And he loves you too. Things were a mess with Shaw in the beginning. You remember that. Hell, he let me go. Jonathan didn’t do that with you. He told you he loved you. He’s going to his family to make things right. Those are all good signs. If things worked out with me and Shaw, I know they’ll be okay for you and Jonathan.”
Logically, I believed that. I really did. My heart was stumbling along and having trouble keeping up, though. I was afraid. “My dad was supposed to love my mom, to love us, and he left.”
I heard Elijah’s breath catch. This wasn’t something I’d ever talked to him about before.
“Are you scared of that? Is that what kept you from having a real relationship?”
I shrugged. “Partly. I mean, I never found anyone I clicked with like I did with Jonathan. I liked Garrett some, but…” He hadn’t felt the same.
“Garrett was a douchebag who didn’t deserve you. Your dad was wrong, and he left. That’s on them. That has nothing to do with you. You have one of the biggest hearts of anyone I know. Don’t let their ignorance make you feel bad about yourself. Jonathan is better than they are. He won’t leave. God, D. You should see the way he looks at you.”
I smiled up at him. “How does he look at me?”
“There’s the Danny I know. Always fishing for compliments.”
I heard the sound of the key in the lock behind us. I sat up in time to see Jonathan step inside, exhaustion clear on his face. His hair was a mess, like he’d been tugging on it and running his fingers through it. My heart sped up, wanting, needing him. For everything to have been okay.
“Hey.” I pushed to my feet and walked over to him. “How did it go?”
Jonathan’s arms wrapped around me. He held me tight, burying his face in my neck. “I love you,” he said, loud enough that I knew Elijah heard him. That had to be a good sign, right? Unless it was a goodbye confession.