‘OK, so how are we going to do this?’ Lisa was asking. ‘We don’t want to go anyplace we know people or where word might get around – we do have our reputations to keep up, after all.’
I shot her a sidelong glance: as if she’d ever cared about that fragile commodity.
‘Hey, I know, how about a weekend at the shore?’
I thought for a moment. ‘That would work. Dave’s working Sunday, and I think he’s got some baseball game on Saturday, so we weren’t planning on seeing each other. It’d work for me.’
‘Me too. Look, I need to be getting back to work, but I’ll check some hotels on the web when I get home, see what I can book us in to, then I’ll give you a bell this evening and let you know what I’ve found. OK?’
‘Great.’
She leaned forward and pecked the end of my nose. ‘Cheer up, girlfriend, I might be all your Christmases rolled into one.’
‘Yes.’ I gave a mock pout. ‘And you know how much I love Christmas.’
Back home that evening, I carried on wondering precisely what I’d gotten myself into, but had to admit I was curious as to where it might end up. Sitting on the bed, but still clothed, I began moving my hands across my belly, first imagining it was another woman’s touch, then that it was another’s flesh I was feeling beneath my T-shirt. I allowed a hand to stray up to my breast, squeezing and stroking it over my bra, homing in on the nipple and teasing it. At least I’ll know where everything is, I thought to myself. It won’t be like some guys’ early attempts to hit the right spot on their partner. I let my other hand drift beneath my skirt and lightly stroke the gusset of my panties.
I was faintly surprised to feel it moistening and tried to concentrate my finger in my mind on her pussy. I felt my lips yielding slightly and increased the pressure of the single probing finger. Her finger, my pussy. I felt a light jangle in my clitoris, but ignored it for the moment, sweeping the tips of my fingers across my inner thighs, while massaging my breast even harder. I wondered if Lisa had already been through this routine herself, while she was making up her mind to ask me, and the thought excited me even more. My finger slid inside my panties and I pushed it deep, then began to bend and unbend it, massaging that magical patch that we’re told is called the G-spot, but which I always think of as my private Eldorado, a place for which many men have searched in vain, but which I can locate with my eyes closed. OK, Lisa, you’re on, I thought, then the phone rang and I snapped out of my passion-trance.
‘Hotel Turquoise, Saturday. Check in at two, out at noon. How does that sound?’
‘I’ll see you there.’ I hung up the phone, and sat without moving. Oh God, it’s going to happen. It’s really going to happen, I thought. Eldorado was forgotten. I was really going to do this.
* * *
And so it was, two days later, Lisa and I were sitting on the beach, planning our next move. And I’ll say this for Lisa: she doesn’t waste time. We’d only been on the sands half an hour and already she had three guys, in three different directions, eyeing us – or rather her.
‘So, what do you think?’ she asked, admiring her handiwork.
‘OK, him.’ I nodded towards the bronzed Adonis seated to our left. ‘He’s right out. He’s way too proud of his bulges and lumps and he probably thinks sex is just another way of doing push-ups. The barely-out-of-his-teens looking kid with the radio blaring Van Halen has a friend with him and I am definitely not going there. Which leaves the one sitting with his face half-buried in a book and sneaking sweetly shy glances in our direction. So now what do we do?’
‘Easy.’ Lisa jumped up and crossed the few yards of sand to our target. I watched his eyes growing larger as she headed towards him, five foot six of well-proportioned blonde, with boobs to die for almost spilling out of her bikini top. She knelt on the sand and I watched them exchange a few words. Then she came back. Behind her, the guy was already gathering up his book, towel and backpack.
‘I told him that Mr Muscles over there kept staring and was freaking us out and asked him if he could walk us to the boardwalk and, if we were attacked, he could run and get a cop.’ The strange thing was, Mr Muscles was staring, or maybe it wasn’t so strange, given that we’d obviously made our choice, and he wasn’t it. I’d hate to be his gym equipment this evening.
By the time we got back to our hotel, everything was set up. Well, not absolutely everything, but at the least the groundwork had been prepared. Mark – an unmarried engineer in town for some kind of gaming convention – would meet us in the lobby that evening, for drinks and dinner and then on to a club. All the way up to our floor in the elevator, Lisa was hopping from one foot to the other, delightedly chanting, ‘We’ve caught a nerd, we’ve caught a nerd.’ Then, as though the thought had just occurred to her, she said, ‘How ironic. He comes to town for a weekend of fantasy; that’s what this gaming thing’s all about, is
n’t it? Dungeons and Dragons and stuff? OK, he comes for one fantasy and he’s about to fall into another one entirely. Oh sister, we are going to blow his tiny mind.’
‘You’re not planning to be mean to him, I hope?’ I knew what Lisa could be like when she got into one of these moods, but she swore she’d be on her best behaviour.
‘Not only that, but when we’re finished with him, he can even stay and watch us.’
‘Oh, I can hardly wait.’ I hoped I didn’t sound too sarcastic.
Mark, the nerd, arrived on time, bought our first drinks and would have happily paid for dinner if I hadn’t grabbed the check before he picked it up and told Lisa that she and I were splitting it between us. Of course Mark protested. I mollified him by letting him leave the tip, then Lisa kept me talking long enough that he paid for the three of us to get into the club. I really hoped she would keep her promise about behaving. I don’t know what engineers earn as a rule but this was shaping up to be an expensive night out.
It was also beginning to look like a washout. Mark was nice enough but he had nothing to say beyond ‘Oh, let me pay for that.’ And trying to talk to him about anything at all, even Dungeons and Dragons, drew no more words from his mouth than the minimum required. I did learn that he wasn’t into D&D and thought it was kids’ stuff compared to some of the new games out there, but that was the extent of my conversation with him. Lisa was having even worse luck and, when she asked him if he wanted to dance, it was obvious that what she really wanted was someone to whisk her around the floor, so she could check out the rest of the talent in the room.
I sat back, watched for a while, then drifted to the bathroom. When I returned, the two of them were locked together in a kiss that had them rooted to the centre of the club as though the entire place was their own domain.
‘Wow, what was that all about?’ I asked Lisa when she finally returned to the table. ‘And where’s Luke Skywalker gone?’
‘Hopefully to adjust himself.’ She smiled. ‘Listen, you might not believe this, but he has the most enormous chopper I’ve ever seen.’
‘You’ve seen it?’ I asked incredulously.
‘OK, felt. We were dancing, right, and I could feel this … I guess you’d call it a mass … against my leg. So I was thinking he had something in his pocket, a bunch of old Kleenex maybe. And then it moved. I felt it move. And not just a little shift, this went from my hip down to halfway to my knee. And I thought, hello. I kissed him and it moved again. And, by the time I let him go, this thing was practically halfway up my stomach and as hard and hot as a witch’s tit.’