‘What is it?’
Rob tried to peer over my shoulder as we sat in the staff room, drinking cup-a-soups for lunch.
‘An invitation,’ I said, jabbing out a swift reply. ‘WTF shall I wear?’
‘What to?’ Rob was still peering. I held the phone away from his gaze.
‘Some event. Probably boring as hell.’
‘Leave that to me.’
I grinned. ‘Not a stretch lace bodystocking!’
‘Oh, it’s lover boy, is it?’ said Rob, turning away in disgust and picking up the newspaper from the coffee table. ‘What was that film of his? Weird, it was. Pretentious twaddle.’
‘I don’t suppose anybody forced you to watch it. Stick with Disney in future, eh?’
‘Oooh.’ He pursed his lips. ‘Touchy.’
My phone bleeped. ‘You’ll wear what you’re told, madam.’
I giggled.
Rob had had enough and left the room.
‘Srsly, though, what sort of do is it?’
‘Schmoozy magazine thing in a Mayfair marquee. 100 Influential Brits in the Arts or something. Free fizz etc.’
Suddenly I was terrified. This was real. ‘Must we?’
‘I’m afraid I must – somebody I want to talk to there re. backing for new film. Come with me. Hold my hand.’
He wasn’t the one who was going to need hand-holding.
‘I’m rubbish at parties, J. Can I sit in a corner and read?’
‘Don’t be silly. I order you to come with me and enjoy yourself. Or face the consequences.’
‘Mmm, depends what the consequences are …’
‘No spanking for a month.’
‘Damn. All right then. But don’t say I didn’t warn you. Magazine-quality arm-candy I ain’t.’
‘That’s why I’m with you.’
‘Sweet talker.’
I tried to be calm. I tried to convince myself that I’d be all right, because I’d be with Jasper, but all week I recoiled from every magazine stand I saw.
All those teeny-tiny, spray-painted-to-perfection images of women everywhere made me feel sick with inadequacy. Not that anybody would be looking at me, of course, but if they did, surely they would be asking what the hell a man like Jasper was doing with a country mouse like me. I’d wear a posh frock, I supposed.
But the posh frock wouldn’t solve the other problems, like my imperfect skin and my unstyled hair and my untoned body.
I was a low-maintenance girl, propelled into a high-maintenance world. What on earth was I going to do?
Jasper had meetings and post-production business in London for most of the week, so I didn’t get to see him again until the Friday night. The party was on Saturday.