He pushes the hot chocolate towards me. ‘Drink some.’
The marshmallows stick in my craw.
‘One problem I have,’ he continues, looking gloomily at the table. ‘I need to make better my English. I have plan to ask you if you can help me. Evenings, maybe. But now, I don’t know.’
‘Oh,’ I say again. My oh-saying skills are on fire today.
‘You have bad idea of me. I have disappointment.’
‘I don’t – I never did. I just thought it was only fair to let you have some freedom. You’re going to dominate all these strangers anyway. I don’t have any claim on you.’
‘I need to understand this, Rosie,’ he said, leaning forwards. ‘You are saying that you like me a lot. This is right?’
‘God, yes. I really do. I …’ No, better not say that. Hold back.
‘There is fire, yes, for you and me? The sex, it is very good?’
‘You know it is.’
‘And we both are enjoying the kink?’
‘Absolutely.’
‘So, you like me in all this way. But you also want me to fuck other girls and leave you alone? This is what you are saying?’
‘No. I’m not really saying that. I only said that because I thought that was what you wanted. Is it?’
‘Not at all. I want you.’
The sudden declaration takes what little wind I have left from my sails.
‘Really? As a submissive? A sex partner?’
‘Of course.’ He rolls his eyes. ‘But more than that too. I mean, you know, we go to a movie and so on. Meet my friends, I meet your friends.’
‘You never really said …’
‘No, because, look at me, Rosie.’
I do. It’s no hardship, but he seems to think he gestures towards something less than desirable. Weird.
‘What I have got to give you? I am poor, I am foreign, I am man who has nothing.’
‘I’ve never seen you that way. Not at all. To me, you’ve got everything.’
At last the anger seems to burn off and a genuine smile breaks out from behind the clouds. ‘See, that is why you are special to me. And you like me for myself.’
‘I think Trixietots and O might do too, thoug
h,’ I say, unable to stop the mischievous thought tripping off my tongue. ‘To be fair.’
‘No, no, they like me because they think I am a dom.’
‘You are.’
‘Thank you. I don’t think I can be professional though.’
‘Really? Why not?’