What He's Been Missing

The door opened again just as I was regretting pouring that wine down the drain. In order to enjoy this kind of crazy talk, I needed another drink to get on their level.

“Dear Lord, she’s beautiful!” Jennifer pointed at the door with one hand and covered her mouth with the other like she was about to cry.

I turned to catch Scarlet gliding into the room in her rose-colored dress. The dress was breathtaking on Scarlet. The neckline dipped down her chest and she was all neck and brown skin beneath a soft rose lace fringe. She looked like the angels of little girls’ dreams. Happy and soft. Pink. Krista was carrying the train behind her.

Everyone rushed over to kiss her and get a hug, but Krista held them back.

“No touching the bride,” she said. “And please don’t make her cry.”

“Ohh!” they sighed, giving her air hugs.

And it was too late. Scarlet was already tearing up.

Krista let one of the hotel waitresses in with a platter holding sippy cups of black coffee—my way of avoiding potential spills. She started handing them out to distract the party from going all gushy over the bride. My girl Krista had learned so much from me. Made me proud to watch her work.

“Rachel! You’re here!” Scarlet whined in the way only the bride can on her special day.

“Of course I am,” I said and to my ears my voice sounded so detached. Like everything that had happened last night at the pier was being translated from those four words. “Why . . . why would you think I’d be anywhere else?”

“It was the craziest thing,” she started, wiping away one of the joyful tears from the corner of her eye with the blue handkerchief Krista had given her. “Last night I had this nightmare that you and Ian got into a big fight and you stormed off and left. And you wouldn’t come to the wedding. It was awful. Ian was so sad.” She started crying a little harder and the handkerchief was being blackened with her eyeliner. “I didn’t know what to do. I just wanted everything to be perfect for him. It was a disaster.”

“Now, now. No sense getting worked up over a dream,” I said, trying to comfort Scarlet and stop the tears.

“But it was so real,” she said crying into a new blue handkerchief Krista had handed her. “I just want to say that I’m so

happy you were kind enough to participate in my wedding. I know things between us haven’t been the best, but Ian loves you, so I love you. And I wouldn’t want our wedding to be any other way. I wouldn’t want to do it without you here.”

Scarlet reached out to embrace me and I felt guilt shoot so fast up my spine that I nearly fell on top of her. Her love for Ian was all in her face. The music, anything I needed to know about this wedding, could be heard in her voice. It was soft, serene, hopeful. Celine. The song was for them.

“I’ll be right back,” I said.

“What? Where are you going?” Krista said. “I’m about to start getting folks lined up. We start in twenty minutes.”

“I just . . . I left something in my room. I’ll be one minute.”

I dashed out of the room before anyone else could disagree. I had to go. I couldn’t let things move on this way.

“I’m sorry,” I said to Ian’s back. I’d excused myself through the groom’s suite with a pretend message from Krista. Xavier tried to stop me, but I assured him that it was official wedding business only.

Ian was standing in the bathroom alone with the door open, frozen, looking at himself in the mirror. I closed the door behind me.

“Don’t do this—I can’t turn you down again—”

“No, that’s not it.” I stopped him and stood in the mirror beside him. “I’m not here for that.”

“Good, because I don’t think I can—” He held onto the edge of the sink. He looked more nervous than he had the night he was supposed to propose to Scarlet. His eyes were withdrawn.

“I came down here because I wanted to say that—Wait, are you OK?”

“Just my nerves. Just nervous.” He pulled at his collar. “I think my collar is too tight.”

“Cold feet,” I said.

He looked at my reflection. “You think so?”

“It’s your wedding day,” I said. “Of course it’s cold feet.”

“How’s Scarlet?”