“I have time,” Kerry said. “And I’m pretty smart.”
“She’s been, I guess, worrying me,” Jamison got out uneasily. “It’s like she’s more erratic. Something about me marrying Val and the baby. She started threatening me. Said she’s going to take me to court. Last month, I sent her twenty thousand dollars.”
“What’s the money for?”
“She keeps saying her son should live like my other son and she’s not letting me get away with just abandoning him. It changes every day.”
“Do you have a lawyer? Anyone looking into your options?”
“With everything happening with Val and the news and Ras, I just wanted to keep things low for a while. I’ve been trying to keep her calm, but it’s getting worse. She wanted to bring Jamison here for the funeral.”
“Why didn’t you let her?”
Jamison looked at Kerry. “Because I hadn’t told you yet.”
Kerry laughed off his intimacy. “So you felt no way about telling me about Val’s child, and even marrying her, and I’m supposed to believe you’ve been holding out on this because you hadn’t told me?”
“I didn’t want you to have to question again how much I loved you when we were married,” Jamison said. “I didn’t want to put you through that again.”
“How do you know what I went through?”
“I don’t know and I’ll never know. But I’ve thought about it. And I think you must’ve wondered if I was lying to you. If I ever really loved you.”
“I know you loved me.”
“And that what I did in Los Angeles meant I loved you less. That it undermined it.”
“No sense talking about it now,” Kerry said.
“Why not?”
Kerry looked at the creamer on the counter beside the half-full carafe. “You ready for me to take you home?”
Jamison exhaled and shook his head. “Fine. Sure.”
“I need to call my mother to tell her to wait to bring Tyrian back.”
“Why is it so bad if he sees me here? I’m his father. I think it’s healthy.”
“Let’s not do this. Look, I’m going to call my mother, and then let’s go.” Kerry walked out of the room so quickly she forgot her cell phone and had to call her mother from the house phone in her bedroom. Thirjane withheld her judgment and suggested that Tyrian stay at her house.
“Just don’t be stupid. You’ve been doing so well,” she said to her daughter, knowing Kerry wasn’t listening.
“Sure, Mama,” Kerry agreed. “Don’t worry. I’m taking him home now.”
When Kerry got back to the kitchen, Jamison was standing in the middle of the floor with his cell phone to his ear and his hand over his mouth. He looked worried, shocked, disoriented. Kerry’s mind went to his mother.
“What’s wrong?” Kerry asked.
“I just saw him last night, man. He was at the wake,” Jamison said to whoever was on the phone. “He said he was going to call me on Monday. He was fine. He—It doesn’t make sense. He wasn’t like that!”
“What is it?” Kerry asked.
“Are they sure it’s him?”
Jamison listened some more and then hung up the phone. He looked like he wanted to scream, or maybe he was screaming but Kerry couldn’t hear it.
“What?”