A pimplyfaced student announced that the music was about to begin again and Ellie didn’t say any more, but her words stuck with Garek through the second half of the concert.
Perhaps the business had lost some of its attraction. The company had always demanded a lot of his attention and he’d never minded before. But lately he’d been aware of a vague sense of dissatisfaction. Sometimes he felt as though he was in a dark tunnel, one that was getting narrower and narrower as he proceeded. He couldn’t go back, but sometimes he thought that if he kept going forward, the concrete walls would start to press against him, squeezing him until he couldn’t breathe…
Maybe that was why he was finding it strangely appealing to go out on weird dates with a woman he wasn’t even sleeping with.
She wouldn’t let him take her anywhere expensive; they went to museums, lectures and cheap restaurants. It reminded him a little of his childhood, before his fa ther had started the company. Every Saturday, he, his sister and parents had gone to the Navy Pier. Doreen had saved her babysitting money and took him for rides on the Ferris wheel and bought him funnel cakes.
He had a lot of good memories of Doreen. She’d been different then; she’d helped their mother cook and clean their small house and flirted with the son of the auto mechanic next door.
After his father started his own business, everything had changed. The business had been wildly successful, and his father had worked long hours and weekends. They rarely saw him after that, but at first Garek really didn’t notice. That first year had been like a constant stream of Christmas mornings. His father got a new car, his mother a housekeeper. Garek and his sister received TVs, toys, whatever they wanted. They moved into the fancy Gold Coast neighborhood of Chicago. Only, there hadn’t been many kids to play with there, and he’d felt awkward at his new fancy private school. His father became totally immersed in the business; his mother got involved in her own projects. Doreen had dumped the auto mechanic’s son and married blue-blooded Grant Tarrington. She’d been dazzled and impressed by her taste of high society.
Garek shook his head and glanced over at Ellie. She was wearing jeans and a sweater instead of an evening gown, but she sat as still and straight as she had at the symphony, listening to the music with every sign of pleasure.
Unlike Doreen, she never seemed impressed by wealth or status. He wondered how she’d gained such poise. She couldn’t have had an easy life. In the last month he’d learned a lot about her family—how her mother’s parents and siblings had come to this country from Mexico, and how they’d all worked hard to get jobs and educations.
Garek had heard all about Ellie’s six cousins and their marriages and their offspring. He knew that her cousin Julio’s six-year-old daughter had gotten an award at school for being “conscientious.” He knew that her cousin Pedro’s four-year-old son collected Pokémon cards.
But as much as Ellie talked about her cousins and their children, she rarely spoke of her mother and father.
The little he’d been able to glean was that her father had loved art and the violin, taken her to see symphony rehearsals when she was very small, and failed at just about every job he tried. Her mother had been kind and loving, but worn down by being virtually the sole support of the small family. And every summer she took Ellie on a bus to visit her family in Chicago.
Garek had guessed that her parents never married. That had been easy to deduce from the fact that she had her mother’s last name and her reticence about her father’s family. He also guessed that worry and uncertainty had shaped a large part of her early years.
He also guessed that the turmoil of her childhood was what had formed two of her most prominent character-istics: a love of her family and an ability to find enjoyment in even the most mundane activities and pastimes. She seemed to take pleasure in every aspect of her life.
Garek shifted on the hard folding chair. Perhaps that was the secret of her appeal. He didn’t know what else it could be. Over the past four weeks he’d kept his word and hadn’t tried to kiss her or touch her, even though sometimes it nearly killed him not to do so. He was aware of her all the time. At the art lecture they’d gone to last week, the chairs had been so close together that she’d brushed against him every time she moved. It had been extremely difficult to listen to the instructor.
He’d made an effort though, because he knew she would quiz him afterward. Professor Jameson had been exceedingly boring, but to Garek’s surprise, the guest speaker had actually been interesting. The European woman had showed slides of her modernart collection. She’d grown up with the Old Masters and loved them, but now preferred contemporary art because it was new and different and exciting. She’d talked about line and form, negative space and motion, color and connections. She’d showed how rational analysis could be applied to the way the art was structured, but also pointed out that logic could never explain the magic of the content contained within.
Garek had wanted to scoff at the woman’s words, but somehow he couldn’t. He’d been thinking of them when he went over to Doreen’s the next night and offered to help Karen with her computer. The visit had been less than magical—Karen had been sullen and uncoopera-tive—but Ellie had looked pleased when he told her about it.
“You can’t expect miracles,” she’d assured him. “Especially with a teenager.”
“But why does she always seems so angry?”
“She’s probably not very good at expressing her feelings. Or maybe she’s just afraid to. Some kids have trouble with that.”
“So you’re saying I should just give up until she’s an adult?”
“Adults can have the same problem.” She gave him a pointed look, and he frowned, still not really understanding. She sighed. “Think of it like starting a business. You wouldn’t work for one day and expect to make a million dollars, would you? You have to spend a lot of time and effort before it starts to pay off. A relationship is the same way.”
Once again, her words stuck with him. He’d gone over to help Karen a second time—and had even stayed for dinner.
Doreen had been astonished.
The meal had been full of wary glances and awkward silences, but she’d invited him back the following week, and it had been easier that time. He’d been telling Karen about the time one of Doreen’s boyfriends had come to the house to take her on a date. While Doreen was getting ready, Garek—still in junior high and barely five feet tall—had taken the brawny twenty-two-year-old Joe Pulaski into the living room and proceeded to ask him about his job, his income, whether he was planning to go to college, what his plans for the future were, and exactly how did Doreen fit into those plans? Joe, sweating and squirming, had leapt to his feet when Doreen came down, and rushed her out the door.
Karen had listened to the story expressionlessly, while Doreen sniffed and said what a little pest Garek had been…but then, unexpectedly, she’d smiled. And he’d smiled back. And then, suddenly, they’d both started laughing, and Karen, her mouth agape, had stared at them with wide, bewildered eyes—
A burst of applause interrupted Garek’s thoughts. He glanced at Ellie, who was clapping vigorously. She had a way of explaining that made everything seem so clear and simple. But at the same time, when he was with her, he felt confused. Looking at her, he felt the same way he did when he looked at Woman in Blue. He could almost see it. Almost get it. Almost…
The applause faded and everyone rose to their feet. Garek looked
down at Ellie. Even with her heels on, the top of her head barely reached his chin. She was so small—and yet she was somehow becoming more and more important in his life.
“Will you let me take you to dinner?” he asked, raising his voice to be heard over the clanking scrape of metal chairs. She glanced over her shoulder, and he added with a smile, “Somewhere inexpensive, I promise.”
For a moment, he saw an answering smile in her eyes. But then, just as quickly, it disappeared, and she turned away.