Being Hers (Irresistibly Bound 1)

“I went for a run yesterday.” Mel had taken it up again in the past few weeks. She needed the distraction.

“Come on, one drink. I’m not letting you sit around and mope any longer.”

“Fine.” Mel didn’t have the energy to argue.

Half an hour later, Mel and Jess were sitting in a bar a few blocks from campus.

“I can’t wait to start at the DA’s office,” Jess said. She too had gotten the internship she wanted. “It’ll probably be lots of paperwork and case research, but I hope I get to see some interesting trials…”

Mel stared into her glass as Jess chatted away. Mel had gotten everything she wanted. She’d ended the year with an amazing GPA, and she’d gotten an internship that most law students would kill for under a woman she idolized. A few months ago that would have made her happy. But instead, she felt empty.

“I need to go shopping,” Jess finished the last of her cocktail. “My wardrobe is nowhere near professional enough. Wanna come, Mel?”

“Sure,” Mel replied.

“I think I’ll go for a whole new look. New clothes, a new hairstyle. The works. I’ve been thinking about trying a shorter style, what do you think? I asked Brendon, and he just said ‘whatever makes you happy.’ I appreciate the sentiment, but sometimes I wish he had opinions of his own…”

Mel swirled her drink around in her glass. Whiskey. She’d ordered it without thinking. She pushed her drink away with a sigh. It should have been Vanessa she was celebrating with. Vanessa had asked Mel if she could treat her when she got the internship. Mel had agreed to it, with the caveat that it was ‘nothing over the top.’

Mel almost laughed now at the idea of giving Vanessa ‘permission’ to do something. She felt a tinge of sadness when she thought about the fact that she’d never experience Vanessa spoiling her again. And that she’d never get to go on that island getaway with Vanessa. She’d actually been looking forward to it.

“Still thinking about Vanessa, huh?” Jess said.

Mel nodded.

“What really happened between you two? It might help to talk about it.”

“It won’t.” Mel downed the rest of her whiskey. She hadn’t told Jess the details of what happened between her and Vanessa. Not because it was hard to talk about. But because Mel was afraid that Jess would confirm what Mel was now starting to feel. That she was an idiot for walking away from Vanessa.

“Okay. I won’t push you.” Jess got up. “I’m going to the ladies’ room. I’ll be back in a minute.”

As Jess disappeared into the crowd, Mel pulled out her phone to pass the time. She opened up her social media feed and started to browse. Among the notifications was a friend request.

From Kim Roberts.

Mel’s stomach dropped. After Kim had broken up with Mel, she had cut off all ties, deleting Mel from everything as if trying to erase their entire relationship. When they had crossed paths at college the following year, Kim had acted like Mel wasn’t even there.

So why did she send this friend request? Why now?

Mel’s curiosity got the best of her. She tapped ‘accept’ and scrolled through Kim’s profile. It was mostly pictures of her, looking almost the same as in college. Most of them seemed to be with the same woman. As she scrolled down, the woman showed up over and over again. Mel reached a post announcing Kim’s engagement. Kim was getting married to someone named Alex. The post was accompanied by a photo of Kim and the woman who kept popping up in all those photos. Alex. Mel’s mouth dropped open. Kim was marrying a woman.

Anger prickled inside her. Kim had dumped Mel claiming she wasn’t into girls, and here she was, marrying another woman? That hypocrite.

Mel put her phone down and took a breath. It was unfair to be mad at Kim for that. Kim wouldn’t be the first person who had struggled with their sexuality. And it made sense. Kim had grown up with a conservative family. And she’d always seemed to feel guilt and shame when it came to sex. Did this mean that Kim had lied all that time ago when she said she wasn’t into girls? And if so, was she lying to Mel or to herself?

As Mel mulled over everything in her mind, something else occurred to her. What other lies had Kim told her? I’m not into girls. This was never serious.

I never loved you.

Mel had never gotten over the things that Kim had said to her that day. Not to mention how Kim had treated her throughout their entire relationship. Kim’s constant emotional manipulation had made Mel second-guess herself even more than she already did when it came to her feelings. Every time she got close to anyone, she would wonder: do they actually love me? Will they just leave me like everyone else? Is this what I deserve?

And Mel had let those stupid, baseless insecurities ruin everything with Vanessa.

She sighed. Mel turning her back on Vanessa after she’d poured her heart out was the final nail in the coffin. It was too late to fix things. And clearly, she was too broken to be in a relationship. Vanessa was better off without her.

Jess returned to the table. Mel turned off her phone and stuffed it in her bag.

“Everything okay?” Jess asked?