Diamond considered herself high-maintenance, but how could she be high-maintenance with no money and no means of being able to manipulate men the way she used to? It was as if she was losing her touch, or men were no longer going for the you-gotta-pay-my-bills-before-you-can-hit-this game. Either way, the money she was getting from welfare wasn’t cutting it.
She didn’t always think this way, despite the monster her father had created within her when she was young. She actually always wanted to be married to the fairytale prince, but she’d repeatedly ruin her chances by being so demanding. Diamond never had a problem as far as looks were concerned, and she had the body as well. Men always flocked to her, and she always managed to get the best of them to wine and dine her. The only problem with Diamond keeping a man was her controlling ways. Not long after she would lock a man down, she would start trying to control their lives. This ultimately turned men off or ran them away completely, and she’d be left alone again. But Diamond would just move on to the next victim.
As she sat there she thought about how sad her heart really was, which she covered up by behaving the way she did. Being aggressive and putting up a front was the only way she knew how to protect her heart. But, truth be told, she was missing her mother. She’d always missed her mother, and now as an adult she often wished her mother was still in her life. She thought about how her father couldn’t teach her the womanly things her mother could have. Like how to mend a broken heart and how to deal with a man.
Diamond struggled and battled with her own mind, and she longed for someone to truly love her for herself and not what was between her legs. The one chance she did get at love was stripped away from her, which made her very bitter and abrasive toward people.
At one time in her life, she did manage to find who she thought was Mr. Right. His name was Byron. Byron was everything a woman wanted in a man. He had the looks, the money, and the charm. He was also a non-confrontational man. When Diamond would go off on one of her hissy fits because she couldn’t get her way, he simply gave her time to calm down and used his mellow swagger to make her melt in the palm of his hands. It seemed as if Byron was that balance that Diamond needed in her life. He was the one who kept her grounded, and only gave in to her selfish and spoiled ways at just the right times.
Diamond eventually fell deeply in love with Byron. This was something she had never allowed herself to do—love. She’d always been the dominant one in her relationships, and now the tables were turned. Byron dominated the relationship without ever having to be forceful. But just when Diamond thought this was going to be her fairytale knight and shining armor to marry her and live happily ever after, Byron left her for another woman.
She was blindsided. She thought their relationship was fine. To say that Diamond was heartbroken was an understatement. She never got a chance to confront Byron or the mistress that he left her for. Diamond tried her best to find out any information on who the woman was that Byron left her for. But she always came up empty-handed. All she had was a letter that he left behind letting her know that she had a lot of growing up to do and that he needed a woman who wasn’t so needy. He wanted a woman to equally give him back the love he gave.
Diamond must have cried for weeks on end, beating herself up and trying to figure out what she could’ve done differently. Never coming up with any answers, Diamond turned her sorrow into rage, therefore reawakening the
monster within her.
And being picked on and ridiculed in high school didn’t help much. It actually made her tough and numb to others’ feelings.
She’d sometimes cry at night in her bed, thinking back on how she grew up being called a whore when she was really just looking for love. But Diamond didn’t realize she was in need of counseling. Her father gave her any and everything she wanted and protected her to no end. He succumbed to her demanding ways, but he never gave her what she truly needed, and that was genuine love.
As she sat on the front step, Diamond watched one young dealer in particular. His name was Pop, and he seemed to be the one who ran the crew. He was tall and muscular, and his thuggish swagger turned her on. She watched him boast while the muscles in his arms flexed. Pop spoke with emphasis, although she couldn’t hear what he was saying clearly.
And then he did it. He grabbed his crotch, and moisture seeped from Diamond’s vagina. It was his swagger that turned her on. It made her think that he could get it popping in bed. Diamond began to picture him mounting her as she rubbed his muscular arms while he lay on top of her in a push-up position.
“Pop!” she called out to him.
Pop didn’t hear her at first, so she called him again. He looked in her direction, and she waved for him to come over.
“How you doing, Ms. Reed?” he asked as he approached the steps.
“How you doing, Pop?”
“It’s all good, Ms. Reed. What’s up?” He stared at the mountain of cleavage that spilled over the top of the tank top she wore.
“Nothing much. I know you got all them little girls running after you,” she said, crossing her legs in a pair of tight shorts.
Pop smiled and exposed a perfect set of white teeth, making him look like a movie star. He gawked at Diamond’s thick, toned legs and licked his smooth, thick lips, envisioning what he would do to her if given the chance.
“Yeah, they tryna get with a cat, you know.” He blushed as he ran his hand across the sea of waves that layered his small, round head.
“Well, if you ever get tired of playing with little girls, you come see a real woman,” she said, uncrossing her legs and opening them so Pop could see the outline of her coochie.
“Word?” Pop asked almost in shock.
“Word, baby boy.” She stood. She then winked at him before she turned to give him a full view of her fat ass as she walked up the stairs.
“Where Dante?” Pop asked.
“He won’t be back for a while. He went to work.” She winked at him.
Pop stood there licking his lips. He looked back down at the crew, and they were still talking amongst themselves. He looked up and Diamond had disappeared into the hallway. Pop quickly walked up the stairs and into the building behind her.
***
About an hour later, Diamond and Pop lay on her bed catching their breaths after a rambunctious session.
“That was real good, baby boy,” she said, panting.