“You don’t want anything to eat?”
“Nah, I’m good.”
“Baby, listen. I was only ignoring your calls and texts because I wanted you to see how I feel when you shut me out,” I said, trying my best to be humble. “But I’m sorry. Don’t read any more into it, because it’s nothing. OK?”
“We good.”
“Are you sure, Nico?”
Nico looked at me and nodded his head.
“OK, so you sure you don’t want something to eat?”
Nico ignored me.
“Do you want to hear about my trip?”
“Not really.”
“See, you do have an attitude! Urrgggh!” I said. “Nico, just talk to me.”
“There’s nothing to fuckin’ talk about!”
I blew some air out my lungs as I shook my head. “So can you tell me where you’re going?”
“I’m going out.”
“See, this is what I can’t stand!” I yelled, storming out of the bathroom.
“Ain’t nobody handcuffing you! You don’t have to stand shit. You can fuckin’ leave,” Nico barked out to me.
Ignoring his threat, I went downstairs and fixed myself a plate of food, but my nerves were shot, and my body wouldn’t let me eat anything. All I could do was sit there and pick at my food. I did that for close to a half an hour, until I heard Nico leave the house without even saying good-bye to me.
I went back upstairs to my room and found myself in a similar position that I had been in right before I’d left for Miami—in my bed with the covers over my head and tears streaming down my eyes.
The only difference was, at least now I had the fantasy thoughts of Kelvin running through my mind to help ease the pain I was feeling.
Even though I had deleted Kelvin’s number from my phone, as I lay there crying in the bed, I thought about going online and logging on to my cell phone account and retrieving his number from my account log. I was sure, if I hit him up, he would be willing to fly up to New York and spend some time with me.
It took everything in me not to reach out to Kelvin, but ultimately I decided against it since I knew Nico was only acting the way he was because of Jasmine. It was definitely time for me to expose her whorish ways to Nico.
My only fear was that he would end up choosing her over me after I exposed her. But I had to do what I had to do because this sitting home-alone, sulking, and crying my eyes out was for the birds.
CHAPTER 22
Jasmine
The day before my trip to Miami, I lied and told Nico I was in Detroit attending my uncle’s funeral. Too much had gone on over a few days, including going through with his plot to murder Shabazz.
Nico understood and, since I told him I would be back that Monday, he told me to just hit him up when I got back. He also told me that he was sorry to hear about my uncle’s passing.
Well, when I got back from Miami, Nico didn’t let any grass grow under my feet. He picked me up at around two in the afternoon and didn’t let me out of his sight until he had dropped me off at my house that evening.
Honestly speaking, pulling that trigger and killing Shabazz was without a doubt one of the hardest things that I ever did in my life. I never thought I’d have the balls to actually pull the trigger. It seemed fake; at first. Like I could pull the trigger and then undo what was done as if it were a dress rehearsal. Only it wasn’t. It was very real. I took a man’s life. And two hours after the shooting, my nerves were still very much on edge, just like Nico had warned me they would be. I was trying my hardest to relax, but I just couldn’t get out of my mind the image of Shabazz’s shocked and fear-stricken face when I shot him. I needed to smoke some weed to calm my nerves, but I was going to wait until later that night when my parents went to sleep, and then I was going to go outside and smoke.
I was surprised and extremely annoyed when my father told me that Simone was at the door because the last thing I wanted at that moment was company. And I was surprised because Simone hadn’t called me before coming over. Usually she would call me before stopping by. I had had a long birthday weekend, murdered Shabazz, and flew to Miami to secretly film Mia, so the last thing I felt like doing was entertaining. Reluctantly I told my father to let her in and to tell her to come upstairs to my room.
“Hey, girl,” I said as I got out of the bed and put on my robe and turned on the TV. I had just come out of the shower, and since it wa